what do you get if you cross a motorway with a wheel barrow? Arrested as a wheelbarrow is not a motorised vehicle, or even a vehicle at all and therefore it is an offence to cross the motorway with it, actually it is probably an offence to cross a motorway with anything now that I come to think of it

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What's worse than the holocaust? Jewish people!

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Why did Lil' Susie leave her blue rain boots at home? Because she had stumps for legs. To attempt to wear them would only hurt her emotionally.

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What's worse than finding a worm on your apple? Trench foot on your eyebrow.

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Why was the 18 year boy afraid of his dad? Cause his dad butt raped him when he was 7.

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What did Justin beiber get for Christmas? A dildo.

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Roses are brown Violets are brown What the hell who keeps shitting in my garden

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i need a pooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

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Who has no penis Religious Believers

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rock crushes scissors, scissors are useless. scissors cut paper, little stips of paper are usless. paper covers rock, structure of rock remains intact.

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Knock knock knock OCD

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What is yellow and white and goes 150 miles down a railroad track? a duck.

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knock knock whos there cops o shit come on they found out about pot lets go

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Why does a squirrel have the tail at the back? Because at the front it's the squirrel.

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What does the ship say when it's cold? Shiver me timbers

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Robin, get in the car!

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Why do most married men die before their wives? Men have on average a shorter life expectancy than women.

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How did the boy fall off his bike? A fridge was thrown off him

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A man is eating in a restaurant and says, "Waiter! There's a fly in my soup!" The waiter says, "I'm sorry, can I bring you some salad instead?"

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What do you call a bookstore with explosive offers? Barnes and Cher-Noble.

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Your momma's so not fat that when a school bus rolled by here house, she just sat there and turned on oprah.

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Knock Knock Who's There Nobody Nobody Who?

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I need a sidecart on my motorcycle just for my diick

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Why did the black man buy a gun? Because he and his family live in a dangerous neighborhood.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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