Why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from the farmer that was trying to kill it.

Why did the little boy throw his clock out of the window? After hours of searching for the snooze button to no avail, the little boy became so irritated at the incessant ringing of the alarm that he threw it out of his window in a fit of rage. The clock landed on an old woman who was walking twenty stories below. She was immediately killed on impact.

what didn't I do when making this joke? Read and agree to the terms of service.

Q: What did the 6 year old cancer patient say he wanted to be when he was older? A: Doesn't matter he died

Whats red and smells like black paint Red paint

My favorite part of the movie Frozen is when the parents die.

your mommas so fat she should be worried about getting diabetes

They say time heals all wounds, yet my leg still had to be amputated.

Why did the puppy get shot? It lived in Detroit.

Q:Wanna know a funny joke? A:Womens Rights

Why did the mailman die? Because everybody dies.

Hillary Clinton and 2 male aides were on a plane on a Friday evening which us not unusual for a secretary of state.

what did the tree say to the person? nothing trees cant talk

What did the transvestite say to the fox? 'scuse me, you've got something on your shoe.

What did the driver have when he got hit by another car? An accident.

Why did the girl cry when her boyfriend brought up the topic about rape? Because she was raped by her father as a child and it was a suppressed memory.

Once upon a time a was born

your mom is so fat she is at high risk of a future heart attack and should be taken to a cardiologist

AIDS

How do you confuse an English Professor? Light your pants on fire and flop around like a fish.

What do you call a deer with no eye? No eye deer ( get it, it's like the red, necked southern speaking states )

Your mamas so fat that she went to the doctor and he said she has a very high case of diabetes so now she's trying to excerise more and watching what she eats.

What did the plane say to the ground when they hit each other Boom

A man walks into a bar. His crippling alcoholism is tearing his family apart.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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