whats the difference between samios and a dog? Nothing.

What did the husband say when his wife startled him as she appeared coming out of the kitchen? You scared me.

VITAMIN C!

why wasnt nathan invited the party? nathan's been dead for 5 years

Why didn't little Billy cross the road? He was dead.

What happens when Lord Voldemort tries to kill Harry Potter? He is unsuccessful.

Whats faster than a black guy with a tv? His brother who is a dentist and drives a fast sports car.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. He flapped his wings, hovered, and the road crossed beneath him.

How can humans fly? Well if you run and jump of a cliff...nevermind you would just smash your face on the ground. I guess that isn't technically flying.

What did Christopher Columbus say to his men before they got on the ship? Get on the ship.

my own dog bit my penis off, it was then put down. it was the worst day of my life.

Q: Have you ever seen Ray Charles wife? A: Nethier has he.

What did the man with one eye say to the woman with one leg at 2 p.m? Good afternoon.

Here's a riddle: What can you catch, but not throw? A really heavy ball, or STDs.

Why couldn't the farmer drive his tractor He had no arms why didn't he have arms Because he was a potato

Potassium? K.

My mother's star sign was Cancer. Ironic how she died really. She was attacked by a giant crab.

What did the boy with cancer get for his birthday? Roses on his tombstone.

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms

whats worse than getting raped by a giant scorpion? Gingers

I wondered why the piano was getting bigger. Then it hit me... I'm sorry I have visual agnosia

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other... Uh oh. A car just ran it over.

tiger woods played golf against peyton manning and yet tiger still cant win.

What do you call a black man a asian man and a mexican man? 3 people

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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