How is a woman like a condom? They are not. A woman is a human being and a condom is a man-made rubber object used as contraception in sexual intercourse

What did the black guy say to the drug dealer? "You should probably stop dealing drugs to people because it is illegal and you could be sent to prison for doing so."

how many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? It depends on a variety of factors such as the size of your mouth, the amount of saliva, etc.

What's worse than finding a worm on your apple? Trench foot on your eyebrow.

What is orange and sounds like a parrot? A Carrot.

What did the monkey say to the lion? I'm being sexually abused by my handler, and feel so violated.

Why did Lil' Susie leave her blue rain boots at home? Because she had stumps for legs. To attempt to wear them would only hurt her emotionally.

What happend to the dude who couldnt fart He blew up

dont be races! be like mario he is a italian plumer , he works for a white princess , catches coins like a jewish guy and he jumps like a black guy.

whats worse than finding a dead cat in your kitchen? a dead cat in your bedroom

Why was the minority crying? He had something in his eye.

A Johnson walks into a hole. Why am I in this hole? Because rape is not an option.

If your Jewish, then don't go to Germany.

Knock Knock Who's there? Bob Bob who? Your neighbor

A jew walks into a bar He receives a phone call and promptly leaves

Roses are red violets are green i can't rhyme bridge

Why did the cab driver talk about the Holocaust? Because he began to shart his pants while singing pocket full of sunshine as a royal blue pancake swerved across the terrain.

Whats sorer than stubbing your toe? Stubbing your toe twice

What is a pirates favorite crime? Piracy, which is still a serious problem in today's society.

Knock knock Who's there It's a policeman informing you that your parents have been killed in a car crash. Your Dad, who has been struggling with substance abuse and depression, found out his wife had been cheating on him, and in a drunken rage, wrapped the car around a tree.

Why was 7 afraid of 8? Because 8 knifed 10.

What is worse than catching someone trying to cheat by looking at your exam? Getting struck by lightning.

They say laughter is the best medicine but i've always found it hard to laugh at cancer.

What do you call a child that has been stabbed? A dead child

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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