Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? Neither has he.

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Why does everybody hates Justin Bieber? Just leave that girl alone!

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Wanna hear a race joke?.....whoops, ya missed it

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How many black people does it take to for there to be a murder? None. A murder is a group of crows,not black people.

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What do you call a black person flying a plane? A pilot.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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What happened when the little girl said Bloody Mary 3 times in the dark? - She got her head smashed in the mirror, all of her intestines were neatly ripped out and was stabbed to death with No.2 mechanical pencils. Then her parents came home from dinner to find their daughter brutally killed in her own room. They notified police, opened a case and gave up after 12 years of searching for her killer. Both parents cried for the amount of years their daughter had been gone and they both decided to kill each other. The father raped the mom while slitting the back of her neck that led to her head being detached. Then the father left his pick up truck running and through his head toward the engine, which didn't really work. So he went back inside and watched Three and A Half Men.

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Q: why was the baker a coward? A: his own mother told him his potential would amount to nothing more than a baker and when a dinosaur came into the bakery he ran away

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A man walks into a doctors office. The doctor says "I've got good news and bad news. Which do you want to hear first?" The man responds "I'd like to hear the good news." The doctor says "I ran a series of tests and found you have leukemia, but your insurance covered everything." The man hangs his head and tears up as he asks "What's the bad news?" The doctor heads for the door as he answers "Your company is switching to a private insurer and because of your pre-existing condition you're being denied coverage. None of your future treatments or appointments will be paid for." The man snaps his fingers and says "Damn! I should've voted Democrat!"

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What would George Washington say if he were alive? "Help! im stuck in a coffin!"

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What is orange and smells like oranges? Oranges.

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Roses are grey Violettes are grey I am colour blind And I suck at rhymes

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Q: What's the worst part about having sex with a cougar? A: Dying...

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What do you call a cross between a dog and a bumblebee? One messed up lab experiment!

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I insist, you go ahead. See you around. how about in four six hours?

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the man walked into the bar and said ur gay

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Knock knock Whose there? Nobody Nobody who? ......................................

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Why couldn't the bunny hop? Because it lost both it's legs

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What is yellow and bright? The sun.

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Why did the little boy lose his fingers? He was left unattended with a chain saw.

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were at work systems r down

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I was there when Lebron James hit a home run to win the Super Bowl.

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Why are Indians so bad at football? Curry

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roses are red, violets are blue, hes for me not for you, if by chance you take me place, ill take my fist, and smarsh your face.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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