How do you fit 10 babies in a bowl? With a blender. How do you get them out of the bowl? You don't, you've already been arrested for multiple cases of infanticide.

what has 2 legs and red all over half a cat.

Why did the kids put pirahnas in Mr. Hermann's fish tank? So they could eat him.

Its linked with the process of extracting uranium isotopes, but lets change the subject, with that said, I hope you can help me with some management advice such as the one you gave me, I will of course pay you.

Roses are red, Violets are blue. Before you sneeze Say PIK-Achoo

What's funny about Magic Johnson's T-Cell count? Nothing. He has AIDS, and it's a degenerative disease, that will eventually result in death. There's nothing funny about that.

What do you call an asian jumping off of a building? A suicide victim.

How do you get a blonde to stop talking? Hit her in the head with a brick.

Q: What happened to the fat man on the roller coaster A: The roller coaster went slightly faster due to the laws of gravity

What would a gay man do with a jelly doughnut? Thoroughly enjoy its fruity taste.

Why couldn`t Sally open the jar? Because she did not have thumbs.

Q: What is green, jumps and says i'm a frog? A: A frog that talks

A little boy was walking down the street when a strange looking van stopped next to him and the man driving asked the little boy where he lived, where his mother was, and if he wanted a puppy because he had some in the back seat.... The boy proceeded to enter the van. The man then handed the child a puppy and promptly drove the boy home.

How do you rape someone? No, its a question. I don't know the best way to go about this.

What's red and bad for you teeth. A brick

Why did the Grizzly bear refrain from attacking the hiker? It didn't. The hiker was torn to shreds within minutes.

Why'd Carly fall off the swing? She got hit by a bus

Why did the chicken cross the road? Scientists are still unable to fully understand the brain functioning of chickens enough to comprehend their motives for doing such a thing.

What goes in dry and comes out wet and sticky? Bubble Gum

What did the farmer say when he couldn't find his tractor? He said : "where's my tractor?!"

what's wose than finding a holocaust in your anti-joke? the potential offspring of courtney love and al gore

what is the difference between an octopus and a dead dolphin? one as tentacles the other is dead.

I may be ugly, but I'm also dumb.

Why did little Tommy eat an apple? Because he was on a diet

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...