I'm a Banker. A woman asked if I could check her balance... So I pushed her off a cliff.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Put down your barbie. Get in the car.

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Why did the accident happen? The breaks on the car stopped working. Why did the breaks stop working? The driver was drunk.

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What's most weird about necrophilia? They copulate with dead bodies.

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Two men walk into a bar. An hour later another man sees them knocked out on the ground. Q: What Happened A: They walked into a BAR.

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What did little John do when he was bored? He went on Anti-Joke

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A guy, arriving at the pearly gates of Heaven, asks St. Peter "Why did I die? Why me." St. Peter replies: "You died the same way everyone does. Lack of oxygen to the brain."

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why did the man have a hole in his face? because syphillis had eaten a hole in it

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What do you call a bunch of spics playing soccer? Professional soccer players.

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You haven't happened to see a cigarette truck around here have you? What's a truck?

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Evil Witch: Hey Snow White, want an apple. Snow White: No thank you, I just ate, I'm good. Evil Witch: But its good! Snow White: No thanks, I'm good! Evil Witch: Ill put caramel on it!! Snow White: NO THANKS! Evil Witch: FINE!! The Evil Witch then pulled out an AK - 47 and violently murdered Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs.

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knock knock whose there? penis penis who? penis want vagina

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Knock knock, ... Little Timmy bursts into tears, Because his parents don't love him.

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Why did the man jump off the cliff? Because he suffered from chronic depression as a result of frequent drug abuse.

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who's a knob,a liar, and systematically ruining a once well-run family football club by employing crooks , buying footballers who are well-passed there sell-out date and getting the team relegated ? steve kean not laughing ? nor are 23 ,000 others

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What did the boy with no legs get for his birthday? Pants.

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A father and son get into a car crash. They go to the hospital and both the father and son are unconsciuos. The doctor comes in to the son's room and says, "I can't operate on this boy, he is my son. How could this happen if the dad is knocked out? It was a gay couple.

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YO MAMA SO SHORT she should really consider wearing long tunic-like blouses, prints that contain vertical stripes, and heeled shoes with a pointed toe in order to create the illusion of length to her silhouette. That having been said, society's limited definition of beauty is quite inadequate for the diverse world in which we live.

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there are two wales chilling at a bar one looks at the other and does a wale call for 2 minutes and the other looks back and say "dude your drunk we gotta go!"

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THERE'S THE IDENTITY THIEF GET HIM!

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whats worse than finding ten dead babies in one recycling bin finding ten dead babies in one trashcan ---sticksack

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Dear Anti Jokes> A black guy walks into a bar...He says hey u Idiot Gimme that Root Beer.. Tony Fast says IDIOT U GET OUTA HERE RIGHT NOW!Black women gets a gun and shoots his son... Tony Fast says im callin the cops on u then they kill alll. And they got hit by a bus. By TobyTurner

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why do elephants paint them selves green ..... to blend into snooker tables. have u ever seen an elephant on a snooker table .... thats just how good they are.

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person 1. Did you here about the black guy who went to college? person 2.no person 1. either have i whats ironic is that they are both black

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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