A man stops another man on the street in Manhattan and asks "How do I get to Carnegie Hall ?" The other man gives him direction, including which subway stop to get off at.

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Remember when Jesse Ziegenbein was skinny? yeah niether do I

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Knock-Knock Come in! ...

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SHUT UP, yes you... WHAT DID I JUST SAY!!!!

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Knock knock. Who's there? You. You who? That's the joke.

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i saw amango it splootered

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What's the difference between a pile of dead baby's and a Cadillac? I don't have a Cadillac in my garage...

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Why did the puppy get shot? It lived in Detroit.

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Knock Knock [Opens Door]

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What is the difference between a ginger and a pile of bricks? nothing. nothing at all.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It is not a sentient animal and is unaware of the dangers it will face.

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What happened when Glen jumped off a building? The rope snapped his neck. He died.

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Why couldn't Jimmy run in the track race? Because he has been paralyzed since he was 3, due to a horrible accident

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Why was the little boy crying? Because there was a hair in his burrito

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One day, a mother was talking with her three daughters. "Mommy," the first one asked, "Why did you name me Daisy?" "Because when we took you home, a daisy petal fell on your head." "Mommy," the second one said, "Why did you name me Rose?" "Because when we took you home, a rose petal fell on your head." "MMMMBBBWWAAAAAAAAAGGGGGHHHHH!" the third daughter cried. She was born with severe cognitive damage and is incapable of coherent speech.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It had completed its task on the aforementioned other side and was returning back to the coop for a feeding now that the sun had set.

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What do you call a white man? A caucasian male.

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Why didn't Santa deliver presents until the night after Christmas? You should go ask someone who knows.

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NASCAR being considered a sport.

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What do you call a black person who sells drugs? A pharmacist.

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Roses are blue Violets are unicorns This doesn't make sense Refrigerator

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Why couldn't the girl talk... she chocked to death -Alan Davis

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Roses are red Violets are blue I like peanut butter Can you fly?

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An Asian, a redneck, an Irish, and an Iranian walk into a bar. All but the Iranian were asked to go back to the parking lot and park their car to take up only one space.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops