Yo mama is so fat she died

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how do you make an idiot laugh? tell him a joke from antijoke

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How do you cut the sea in half? You can't. There are an odd amount of letters. You would have to jeopardize the "e", but then it would no longer be "sea".

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A wise man once said a journey of a thousand steps starts with one step. The wise man also smoked weed and starved to death in a cave.

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How's the weather? Good.

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A Blonde, Brunnette, and red head are on the beach. They find a sand gene and are each granted a wish. The Brunnette wishes for a yot. The Red Head wishes to never again get sun burn. The Blonde wishes for more sun. The world is overtaken and insinerated by the sun. An alien spaceship finds the Red head in a space suit floating around randomly when they ask how she survived she says "I don't sun burn"

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So a guy walks into a bar and says, "I can hold a spoon in between my butt-cheeks." Jillian Michaels asked him if that will help him lose weight.

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Two boys go down stairs on christmas day. They fall and die.

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ah-ah. the proper response to an anti joke.

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That Rachael chick needs to get back in the kitchen

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Whats the differnce between love and herpies Herpies last forever

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A man is riding down the road on his horse, Sally. He happens to see a horse without a rider, but with two saddles. He finds this peculiar, continues into town, and has a fine day.

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Son: i like gaming Mom: you are wasting your life *son jumps in trash can

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Do you know what happens to a toad when it's struck by lightning? The same thing that happens to everything else.

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the idiot's house. "Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "The chicken"

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What did the fish say after it's head was cut off? Nothing, it was a fish.

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How many Women's Rights activists does it take to change a lightbulb? None. They can't change anything.

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What's the difference between a black person and cancer? If you don't know already, you should really question your countries education system and your parents upbringing.

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What do you say when your hot chocolate is to hot? This hot chocolate is too hot.

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Person 1 - Did you know there is only evidents of killer whales killing in captivity Person 2 - tell that to my uncle Pete... He's deaf

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How come the man could read the directions? Because it was right side up.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she has no arms

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what's worse than me fucking your mom she enjoyed it

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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