Why was the boy holding his breath? A man was holding his head under water.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

An airplane flies due north at 100 m/s through a 30 m/s cross wind blowing from the east to the west. Determine the resultant velocity of the airplane.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Q: how do you get a live elephant into a refrigerator? A: you buy an industrial sized refrigerator from cost-co and then walk the elephant slowly but surely through the door. Q: how do you get a giraffe in a refrigerator? A: after removing the elephant by means of walking out the door, slice the giraffe into small pieces approx. 1m by 1m by 1m and put those into the refrigerator

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Q: What did the clam say to the postman? Moral: "Hey its me the worlds only talking clam! How you doing dude!"

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What's the oppicite of brown???? Something not brown.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What is round and bad-tempered? A vicious circle

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What did the alcoholic Indian do? Continued to drink and further worsen his people's stereotype.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

A black man approaches a customer service desk and asks for help. He is racially discriminated and receives no help with his problem.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Roses are red violets are blue Timmy what are doing with that gun?! Bang....

thumb_up thumb_down +12

how do you make a baby cry? you throw a brick at it's face!

thumb_up thumb_down +12

A scantily dressed woman is standing at an intersection. She is a prostitute.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why is the Mexican a gardener? He has a mental disability that makes him unable to do more than a simple task.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Do you like waffles yeah we like waffles do you like pancakes do you like french toast yeah we like french toast dododododod let me get a mouth full. WAFFLES!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Smelly Indians.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

How many licks did it take for the owl to get to the center of the tootsie roll tootsie pop? A: Since when did owls have tounges?

thumb_up thumb_down +12

whats worse than having ants in your pants? getting sotomized by a lightsaber

thumb_up thumb_down +12

how do you confuse a blonde do nothing

thumb_up thumb_down +12

I was sitting in traffic the other day. I was runover.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Who took the cookie from the cookie jar? Your mom

thumb_up thumb_down +12

"Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "Interrupting Doctor" "Interrupting Doc-" "You have Cancer'

thumb_up thumb_down +12

How many jewish people can you fit in a Volkswagen? depending on the class of car but a mid range SUV can seat up to seven.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Two black guys are in a car. Who is driving? One of the black guys.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

someone jumped off a bridge he died

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Did you hear about the guy that told bad jokes? No.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops