What did the dog get for Christmas? euthanization

A. Why did the chicken cross the road? B. I don't know, why? A. I asked first.

Knock Knock Who’s there? Your son Your son who? Your son who’s sick of having a paranoid mother who won’t just open the door!

I FEEL LIKE I'M RIDING ON A CLOUD actually it's physically impossible to ride on clouds because they are sparsely situated ice particles.

My girlfriend wanted to talk about her feelings ... SO I TOLD THAT BITCH THAT... i really loved her and care about her feelings

What do you call a white guy with 5 black guys. The owner of a basketball team

Why did the cow hail a taxi? Because cows can't drive.

Roses are red, Wait. Why start this poem when you cant finish it Refrigerator

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 beat the crap out of 8.

What's black and white and red all over? Nothing, because if it's black and white, it can't be red.

What did the man say while he was in surgery? Nothing, he was in surgery.

A black guy, a white guy, and a Canadian walk into a bar what do they all have in common. They are all involved in my Joke.

Everytime God shuts a door, he opens a window... ...But I am the Goddamn locksmith!

A duck walks into a bar and asks for a beer. The bartender realizing this is an odd situation, seeing that ducks cannot articulate the English language, realizes he must be dreaming. He wakes up and turns to tell his wife about the dream, but she won't respond. He then realizes how his marriage is in shambles...

What is worse than a nuke exploding? Going to the hospital and finding out you have cancer and aids.

How many chickens does it take to cross the road? It only takes 1 chicken to cross the road. You don't need a lot.

roses are red violets are blue if you and your sister were hanging from a cliff i'd save your sister

what starts with b and ends with b? The bomb i just planted in your house.

Why does Ray Charles always smile? Because he doesn't know he's black.

What's a green tasty vegetable? None, they're vegetables.

What do you call someone who kills a black man? A murderer

Knock Knock Who's there? The KKK, got any blacks?

What's 1+5 2+4 3+3 4+2 5+1 Whats 6+1 If you said 6 you're stupid.

Knock Knock Who's there? The police. The police who? Your wife has been killed in a car accident.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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