why did the alien eat the cow? peer pressure

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Knock knock. Who's there? Navy Seals. *BOOM* *waiting* "Yeah, he's dead." -Navy Seals

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What did the fish say to the Asain man Nothing. a fish can not talk

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knock knock... whos there? NOT BIN LADEN!

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have a short term memory Roses are red

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whats pink and fluffy? pink fluff.

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Why was the man afraid of the fish? He had ichthyophobia.

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Why is it okay to have four cats? Because I said so.

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How many people does it take to make a fun party? Idk, that's why I asked you, you see I'm throwing a party and wantedto know how many people I should invite.

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How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Bridget, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and since it is rather long, it brushes against her round breasts. Even though she is a little sweaty, you realize what a beautiful woman she is, and you decide not to kill here. You instead ask her to marry you, and after she replies "yes", with tears of joy streaming down her face, you two make passionate love in the front seat of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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Q. what happend to the guy who walked by an alley in new york? A. he got beat up by a robber wich took hes money, cellphone, keys and his abillity to walk.

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Why is Short Circuit the best movie ever made? Because it tastes like lemons

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What's black and red? I black guy bleeding to death

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Q:Why didn't the Mexican get out of the box? A:Because he liked it in the box.

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What do you hear when the world trade center collapsed?, no seriously I wasn't even three yet.

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What's the best way to toss a salad? With a salad spinner from the home shopping network.

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Q: What do Captain Jack Sparrow, Captain Crunch, Captain Morgan and Captain Kangaroo all have in common? A: They are all caucasian

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What do you calk a dirty mexican? a hard working gardener

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I have a friend named Dave, he lost his ID and now we call mim Dav

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, MAKE ME EAT LEMONS, I ATE U!

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What rhymes with turtle? RAPE

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wanna hear a cat joke? just kitten

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How can you get a handicap black man to walk again? You don't...... Unless you motivate him with fried chicken. Anti-anti-joke!

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Why did Susie fall off the swings? She had no arms. Knock! Knock! Who's there? Not Susie.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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