knock knock whos there? ughh omg youre dying what yeah dear god ok ill call 911 no im fine its just a seizure ok get well soon

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What's worse than a rapist? 2 rapists

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Knock knock Who's there? The police, your family is dead.

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You can pick you're friends, you can pick you're nose, but you can't run over a pedestrian.

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What do you call an animal with 4 legs ? A dog...

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Whats worse than the Holocaust? A second one

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What do you call the offspring of a gerbil and a hamster? Whatever you want.

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A man walks into a bar not a duck though

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why was the little boy sad? he had a frog stapled to his face.

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Who's obsessed with death and love to make jokes about it? The majority of the contributors in this site.

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A blonde and a brunette walk into a job interview. The brunette gets the job because she is more qualified and has more experience.

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What separates man from animal? Divorce.

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What did the Black man say to the prostitute? Your job makes the risks of getting AIDs and other STDs much higher than the average person's.

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Why is the boy lying down on the floor? The chandelier fell on him.

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A man walks into a bar and orders 12 shots. "8?" Asks the bartender, to verify he had heard correctly. He feels unsure of giving the man 12 shots but does so anyways due to his financial situation and he hopes for a generous tip. Afterwards, the man kills 9 people in a car crash due to his level of intoxication and the bartender seeps into depression due to his feeling of guilt.

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Here's a riddle: What can you catch, but not throw? A really heavy ball, or STDs.

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A man walks into a bar. It's a fine establishment. He orders a couple of beers and takes a cab home like a responsible man would. He is then killed with a croquet mallet.

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what happens when a retard hits an iceberg with a gigantic boat? 1517 people die.

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What did the pirate say to the ninja? I have aids.

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

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Im about to rewrite History....... History

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Um...thats impossible because chickens live on farms theyre are no roads....

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guess what? bannanas

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what do you call a boomerang that doesn't work? a stick

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops