why was Lucy fat? Her BMI was over the recommended average.

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A man walks into a bar with an octopus. He tells the bartender that his octopus can play any instrument. The bartender gives the octopus bag pipes. The octopus fiddles with the bag pipes but can't seem to play them. The man gives the bag pipes back to the bartender and leaves with his octopus. He is quite embarassed and decided to get bagpipe lessons for his octopus.

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Q. What did the chinease man say when he got flattened by a plane? A. Nothing, he died instantly.

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What do you call a spaceman on Mars? Confused, because with the current technology it is impossible to send a human into space and onto Mars.

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Why doesn't your dad want to have sex with your mom? Because my penis is already in her vagina, thus your dad's inability to place his penis in her vagina.

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What is worst than Justin Bieber new album? Being a jew during the holocaust or aids.

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im 14, over weight and spotty! you interested? .... im desperate:)

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How are leprechauns and lions similar? The both start with L.

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Why did the kid drop his ice cream cone?? Cause he got hit by a bus.

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? Two worms in your apple.

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When the world ends what would be the death toll It would be unknown since every one would be around to calculate it

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Q: Who was the most famous French skeleton? A: Napoleon bone-apart.

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Q: What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? A: Reading re-posts of classic anti jokes posted by lonely teenagers.

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Q: How many Jewish people can fit in a four door sedan? A: 4, or possibly 5, depending on the sedan's optional seating, and depending on whether the gentleman are comfortable enough with each other to scoot closer to allow a 5th friend to join in.

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How did the little boy survive the massacre? He didn't. How did the little girl survive the massacre? She was the killer.

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Q. What happened to the women who cut her finger? A. she got staff infection and died.

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Whats worse than the Holocaust? Anal

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Why did dallin fall off the swing he got hit by jds big penis

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Bob: I have a funny knock knock joke, but you have to start it. Joe: Ok. Knock Knock. Bob: Who's there? Joe: Uhhhhhhh Bob: Exactly.

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Why did the fat ugly bald Jewish man go to the bank? He needed to take out some cash because he was going out for lunch at a highly recommended restaurant.

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WHat is funnier than a baby swimming. - A baby drowing.!

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What did romeo say to Juliet? A lot of things, Then he gave her a flower.

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Why was billy sad? He was being brutally hacked to peices behind his garage

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What was little Sarah's last Words to johnny before he got hit by the bus??? Can i have your ice cream.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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