What's 2+2? Gonorrhea

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Two fuses wearing bombs for hats were sitting on a bench with their frayed feet dangling on the ground. A match was walking along and tripped, hitting it's head on the ground and bursting into flame. Luckily the fuses had finished lunch by that time and gone back to work. Unluckily for the match it died from burns to 80 percent of it's body.

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How does an asian man drive? He hops into the car, turns the ignition, slowly accelerates from his parking spot and merges into everyday traffic

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One walrus says to the other, "Why are you shaking like that?" The other walrus says, " I've been addicted to ectasy for three years. It's ruining my life."

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What do George Washington, JFK and Hillary Clinton have in common? They've never been to my house.

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what worse than bitting into an apple and finding a worm bitting into a worm and finding an apple

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Why was the girl-scout crying? I hit her in the knee with a baseball bat.

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Roses are red, violets are blue. i have Alzheimer's, cheese on toast.

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What did one alien say to another alien? I miss Mexico.

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A: What's that on your shoulder? B: A birthmark. A: How long have you had it? B: Don't know.

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What's green and eats nuts? Syphilis.

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What did the caninibol do when he duped his girlfriend He wiped

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Two jews walk into a bar. They drank beer and shot some pool and had a good time.

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A guy wanted to write a joke. He didn't.

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-Knock Knock -Who's there? -It's just Linda from nextdoor. -Oh hi Linda come on in.

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a black man walks into a shop, he buys his groceries, then leaves...

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What's long, brown, and in the toilet? The chocolate bar I just threw in the toilet.

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What's the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson? Neil Armstrong walked on the moon and Michael Jackson appeared in court several times under charges of child molestation

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How do all Asians look? With their eyes.

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A blind man walks into a bar, bystanders help him up.

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What has four legs and a tail? A table with a tail

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What did the mother do when she find out her daughter left for the party? Nothing. She realized her daughter was old enough to make mature descions.

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What did the confused blonde girl ask to a nearby student? Why is there a man painted green throwing forks at me

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? He had no arms Why couldnt he get up? He had no legs What did the boy get for Christmas? Cancer What did the boy get for Easter? A funeral Knock, knock Who's there? Not the boy.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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