Q: What did little Timmy get from his mother this Christmas? A: The contents of her will.

What did the mexican say to the other mexican? Lets go get some tacos.

Relax, close down the place, he wont get very far. The rest of you better stay inside, and I promise you will all remain safe and secure.

Q : Who is the most famous celebrity, Lady Gaga or Justin Bieber? A : Neither, because they are just fads.

What do you call a fish with no "i's"? A blind fish.

what do you call a brown man that has been repeatedly shanked and has been fucked up the arse by 10 Rag heads in one night and thrown in a well to slowly and painfully die? Lloyd.

roses are red, violets are blue, i have alzheimers, cheese on toast.

A newly wed couple is at the beach and the wife asks for sunscreen and the man says he forgot it in the car. He goes to the car only to find that the car had been broken into. He goes to call his wife and they go back to the car only to find that the car had been stolen. #Turns out the thief broke the window to steal the car but saw the owner coming and hid behind a bush and upon the man going to call his wife he continued with his mission

why did the black guy buy magnum condoms? because his white friend knew the cashier and thought it would be awkward for himself to buy them.

What did Ghandi tell St Peter as he passed through the Gates of Heaven? He didn't. There is no afterlife.

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

Bugsys back back back again with a brand new track cumming on megs back back back with a new boxing cap cap cap, stealing millions from banks having a wank coz hes a lanky cockney mong

What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

My aunt always said slow and steady wins the race She died in a fire

An egg and a sausage walk into a bar, and the barman says "sorry, we don't serve breakfast".

What did the blanket say when it fell off the bed Awwww sheeeeeeet!

Roses are black. Violets black. Guns are black. My van is black.

Why'd the cop pull over the black person? He made a traffic infraction.

what did the leprosy survivor get for christmas a amputation

Why was Jimmy sad? Because he has a frog stapled to his forehead

Don't count your eggs before you put them in a basket.

Why did the black man cross the road? To escape from his owner.

Q: Why did the black man run from the chainsaw? A: Someone was trying to kill him with it.

What's the difference between Chuck Norris and Bigfoot? Nothing. Their both really hairy.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...