What do you call a Fly with no wings? Dead.

What did the cannibal do after he dumped his girlfriend........... Wiped his ass

What makes the turtle move? It's legs.

Once upon a time, your dog got hit by a car this morning

God hates fags, no...god i'snt real

How do you get a cow off a swing? Hit it with an axe.

KANE AUDITIONS FOR BRITAINS GOT TALENT SIMON COWEL REAPES HIM

What is a good remedy for the common cold? A piping hot bowl of chicken-noodle soup.

Why are black people like trees? Because they fall down if you hit them multiple times with an axe.

Why was the woman worried? She was coughing up blood

A man came home from work and said to his wife im going to kill u

Rush Limbaugh

Why did the dinosaur rent a DVD in Redbox about a sex? Because he didn't own a Blu-Ray player.

What do you call a man who eats another man? An man eater.

A man walks in to a bar, what does he say? Ouch.

MRCANN YOUR A FUCKIN' CARROT LERN 2 FOCKIN SIT IN YER HOLE YA FUCKIN PLANT

whats worse than 4 dead monkeys? 5 dead monkeys.

why did the black man shoot himself? because he commited a crime and was sorry for what he had done

What did the Apple Tree say to the Oak Tree? Nothing.

who else is on here?

what happened to the black man that fell of the bridge? he drowned due to the fact the african-americans do not swim very well.

A man name Bill works 12 hours a day at a warehouse, almost everyday a week. It is a hard job but Bill does it to support his beautiful wife of many years. Bill thinks the long hard days are worth every moment he gets to spend with her. One night, after a hard day, he comes home to find another man in bed with his wife. Bill begins to sob and yell "I work 12 hours a day at a warehouse....." His wife yells back. "We already read this part, get to the punchline".

Why did the young girl fall off of the swing set? Because a man came up behind her and pushed her. He then picked her up, brought her home and fed her a nice three course meal and put her to bed. When she woke up she snuck out of the house and alerted the police.

Barbara and Martin died in their apartment. The neighbor walked in and found glass and water everywhere. How did they die? -Barbara and Martin were fish.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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