What did Timmy's mom think of his art project? Nothing, she screamed and called an ambulance because she saw that he had tripped and fallin onto a pair of scissors and they just so happened to peirce his heart.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

So these two guys walk into a bar... Well, I forgot the rest of the joke, but your mother a whore.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why couldn't the little boy tie his shoes? He had no arms

thumb_up thumb_down +6

what is worse finding a worm in your apple? Finding a grub in your apple.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What is round and bad-tempered? A vicious circle

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What happened when the boy stood up? He had all his limbs hacked off and soon after died.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

The Americans have just spent millions of dollars working on a pen that works in space. I would of just used a pencil.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

How does Batman's mother call him to dinner? She doesn't, she's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What's worse than the holicost? The ninja turtles

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A Irish leaves and bump in to a really tall the Irish sorry boss

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A man walks into the office for an appointment. The doctor proceeds to perform the usual examinations, before asking the man to turn his head and cough. As is standard, he feels the man's testicles to check for irregularities. The man jokes, "Say doc, couldn't you at least ask me to dinner first?" The doctor replies, "You have testicular cancer." He died a month later.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why couldn't the black man get out of jail? He couldn't post his bond.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What did the magician's assistant say after the magician cut her in half?... Nothing. Her spine was severed and she died instantly.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

how do you make Will Smith cry? cut off his toes and fingers.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

So a guy with alsimers walks into a bar........I forget the rest.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What do you call a bear with no teeth? A Gummy Bear!!

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What do you call a fat ginger kid? Whatever his name is.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What did the doctors tell the boy with cancer who is on his way to being released from the hospital? "you are going to die," why give him hope and be proved wrong. This way if they are wrong the whole situation is a miracle, if they are right..... "I told you so"

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What do you get when you see a black man writing? A man devoted to getting a education.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Your mother is so fat that she's more prone to cardiovascular disease than other people who stick to the proper BMI or body mass index

thumb_up thumb_down +6

what do you call a child with bruises on his face? Child protective services.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A guy went to McDonalds and asked for a cheeseburger: —Can I have a cheeseburguer? —No

thumb_up thumb_down +6

www.xnxx.com

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the boy fall off the swing? Someone said "catch" and threw a bowling ball at him.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops