What do you call a person who walks but doesn't run? A power walker What do you call a person who runs but doesn't walk? Someone running to the nearest bathroom holding there crotch.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

I accidentally solicited a prostitute today. I was driving in an iffy neighborhood and saw a woman on the sidewalk, so I stopped to ask if she could give me directions. She must have misheard me.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Two polar bears are sitting in a hot tub. One polar bear asks the other to pass the soap. The other responds, "No soap, radio!"

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Twelve people are in a plane. One of them says: "Man, we really are not so many in this plane" Another one replies: "It's because it's a 12 seats plane." Another says: "Do 12 seats planes even exist?" Another one answers: "Of course they do." Another person says: "Guys, are we even flying?" Someone says: "I don't know" Another says: "Yes, we're flying, look out the window." Another says: "I have cancer." Someone reacts: "Oh, I'm really sorry for you" Another: "Yes, me too" Someone adds: "It's really terrible" Another says: "Has science made any progress recently?" The plane crashes.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What's one plus one? 2. Two legit, two legit to quit, hey, hey... What's one plus two? 3. Easy as abc, 123, abc, baby you and me. What's one plus three? 4. hes a jolly good fellow, for he's a jolly good fellow.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

There are 3 Chinese guys migrating to the USA, Chu, Bu and Fu. . Chu added a 'ck' to? his name and became Chuck Bu did the same thing and became Buck. Fu got sent back to china

thumb_up thumb_down -9

i was quite upset when my girlfriend called me a peodifile, what does she know, shes only 6.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Q: How do you give a frigid woman an orgasm? A: By making her come.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What do you call a green dog? A green dog.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Yo momma so fat she weighs 400 pounds.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did the cow say moo? Cows can't say anything they actually make noises that humans interpreted as "moo"

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did the chicken cross the road? It's better if you don't understand

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Whats worst than a cold? Being shot in the face repeatadly by a rocket launcher until death.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Doctor! Doctor! There's a fly in my soup! Gross.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What's worse than seeing Helen Keller behind the wheel of a car? Being run over by Helen Keller.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

did you hear the joke about the vagina ....... you'll never get it

thumb_up thumb_down -9

The Israeli asked the Japanese guy to open his eyes The Japanese guy said, I'm not squinting you crazy Jew. You're the one that sold me these cheap glasses.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

If you could eliminate one thing in your life, what would it be ? My ex.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Living in Africa.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

So there was a guy in the middle of the street, how did he survive? ...He doesnt because he gets hit by a car becuase hes in the middle of the street...

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Dani Barton is a stupid GIRL

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What do u firmly grasp and stroke until u can't go any longer? A shakeweight....

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Two elephants in a bathtub, one says, "Pass the soap." The other one says, "No soap. Radio?"

thumb_up thumb_down -9

test

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops