What do you call a dear with no eyes. A mutilated dear.

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What did the retarded guy say to the other retarded guy? Youre Retarded

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my ilkshake brings all the boys in the yard. and the local health inspector's like , have you got a permit to be selling dairy beverages from a home based business?

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A cow went into a meadow and ate some grass. Some time later he wandered off.

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What did the apple say to the grape? Nothing, fruit are incapable of speaking

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Why can't the man get a good jod? Because he did not go to college and there for did not get a good education.

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What is the diffrence between a jew and a mexican One is a religous practice and the other is a racial diversity

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An Englishman, a Scotsman and an Irishman walk into a bar. They have some pints then leave to do their respective tasks for the day.

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What Happens if a Muslim boy gives you a bomb? You give it to someone else as your playing tnt tag and the bombs a toy

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why did the 42 inch plasma screen blow-up 6 hours before the england match ? because it knows .

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Q. Whats the diffrence between a squirl and a chipmunk? A. A squirl has a squirl mom and a squirl dad while a chipmunk has a chipmunk mom and a chipmunk dad.

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mary poppins' handbag is full of fuckin dick

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Ask me what my favorite color is. What's you favorite color? Blue.

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The world does not deserve our rule, it requires effort, teamwork, respect for oneself and others, tolerance, love, patience, strength, honor, loyalty... ...Face it, people do this because it is far easier to be ruled, than to rule, it is far easier to do as told, than to ask oneself what one desires with ones life. A king that suffers the burden of his people, falls of his throne, a king that enjoys the burdens of his people, creates burden, and grows as people suffer. We cannot change that, maybe we have yet to evolve to that point as humans, or maybe it is time to accept, that we have evolved past this.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Hello there. I am Elder Young and I with the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. What would you say if someone were to offer you peace and happiness through all of eternity?

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What do you call a black pilot? A pilot you racist bastard..

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How many jews does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One. It really isn't that hard.

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What did the smoker say when he coughed? Ohhh dam it's turned into a smokers cough

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Why was Reed sad? His mother has a penis

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What do you get with you crossbreed a lamp with a chicken? Nothing... You can't crossbreed an inanimate object with a living being.

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What does the ship say when it's cold? Shiver me timbers

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Whats the best thing about having sex with twenty eight year olds? There's twenty of them.

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What would Jesus say if he was alive today? “Nehwê tzevjânach aikâna d'bwaschmâja af b'arha.”

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What did Tarzan shout when he saw the elephants coming? "Here come the elephants!"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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