Roses are red violets are blue I want to F%$# you with a rake

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Q: When there's something strange In your neighbourhood, Who you gonna call? A: The Local Authorities!

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knock knock. who's there? 9/11

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what is Rebecca black's favorite restaurant? Ruby Tuesdays

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They say duck tape can fix every thing, Not my grandma's cancer for that matter.

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What do you call a fart in a box? Your mom's pussy.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 had a gun...

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a brunet,a redhead,and a blone were stranded on an island 4 miles away from land. the brunet swam 1 mile and drowned. the redhead swam 2 and drowned. the blond swam 3 miles and decided to swim 3 miles back to the island

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Why were there only 5,000 Mexicans at the Battle of Alamo? They only had 1250 trucks.

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Where's my baby??

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What do you call a gay man having sex with a woman? Sex.

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What's an X-BOX? A box where you find a treasure

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what is the difference between gravel and dead baby guts? i dont eat gravel.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Sugar is sweet And so are you But the roses have wiltered The violets are dead The sugar bowl is empty And so is your head

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Why did a jew die? It got killed by a nazi.

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Three penguins sitting in a tub. The first penguin says to the third penguin, "Hey would you pass the soap?" The penguin in the middle says, "What do you think I am a typewriter?"

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Lady is taking her Alzheimer grandpa to shop for his birthday. Parks, gets out and opens the door for him. He looks at her and asks? Who are you?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Cause fuck you thats why

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Ding dong Who's there Electricity

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What do you call a woman who is addicted to crack, has a light mustache and huge saggy tits, has had 4 kids with 4 different fathers and makes her living giving hand-jobs behind the bus station? Mom.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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What did little Suzy get for Christmas? Molested

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This is a shovels and rakes conversation. No hoes allowed.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Trash gets dumped Just like you

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops