how many poeple does it take to change a light bulb? you spelled people wrong.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What did George Washington say to his men before crossing the Delaware River? "Men, we're crossing the Delaware River."

thumb_up thumb_down +3

How do you get a drugged man, a giant sombrero, and a guitar into a Chuck-E-Cheese? You take multiple trips.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did your girlfriend dump you? because someone brainwashed this guy into believing this nonsense.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

How do you get your dog to stop peeing on the floor? SHOOT IT!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did Hitler kill six million Jews? Why not? --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

thumb_up thumb_down +3

LO LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOPLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOO O O O O O O OLO LOL OL O LO LO LO L OL

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What color is the grass on Bob's lawn? Bob lives in a apartment.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

* anti-punchline

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the man eat his wife? He was a cannibal

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the ceiling fall down? Because there weren't any walls.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

How do you confuse a girl? Easily.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

why is the spine-tailed swift the fastest bird? because its faster than the second fastest bird.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

No your aunties a joke

thumb_up thumb_down +3

im not black, im Joseph Kony

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What did the Irishman say to the German? "Sorry, do you have the time?"

thumb_up thumb_down +3

How many black people does it take to screw in a light bulb? One.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Q: Whats more funny than a pile of dead babies? A: The one in the center eating its way out

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Knock Knock Who's there? Me, wondering why your not naked.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why wouldn't Helen Keller be able to drive if she was alive today? She would be inside her coffin not knowing how to get out

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Two hunters are in the woods. One of them clutches his chest, falls to the ground, and loses consciousness. In a panic, the other hunter calls 911 and tells the operator that his friend might be dead of a heart attack. The operator says "Before we send a coroner instead of an ambulance, first make sure he's dead." The hunter says "Alright." There is a pause and then BLAM! "Okay," says the hunter, "now what?" The operator follows standard procedures to keep the hunter on the phone, lucid and calm. 45 minutes later, police reach the scene, arrest the hunter and begin a months-long investigation. Forensics determines that the dead hunter was likely alive prior to being shot in the face at point-blank range. The defendant is charged with first-degree murder and receives a 30-year sentence. On the 9th year of his sentence, he is stabbed in the chest 6 times by an initiate in a rival prison gang and dies the next day. He was 53.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Salt is brown, Pepper is white, my kitchen is in a mess.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the boy trip? A small explosion in the center of the earth caused by a hobo created a tsunami, causes a seagull to fly off in alarm. The seagull lands on a Smart Car, causing it to crash, which sends a signal off to a satellite in space. Because of this, a massive earthquake occurs. Oh, and the boy? There was a bowl of soup left carelessly on the ground.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

I don't want to share my name yet if that is okay, I mean I have not seen you, but you have seen me just saying. Tell me how old you are first, I am 26, or 27, being more or less an orphan since birth details like that kinda lose themselves. And no, its not Eliza, I will wait for you here if you do not mind, there are still people that have thought I am Nero all this while, that`s what worries me, I doubt I can convince them I am chatting with myself this time around.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops