Why did the Egyptian woman not manage to work the washing machine? The instructions were in English.

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What do you get when you put a baby in a blender New Doritos Dip

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Q: Whats white and fluffy? A: White fluff

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Whats the difference between a black man and a bucket of shit? The bucket.

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So my wife was in the kitchen, and I asked her to make me a sandwich. She agreed. I then volunteered to make her one. Lesbian relationships are amazing.

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? nothing he was Jewish

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Heard about the dyslexic fellow who sold his soul to Santa? That worked out OK, but Christmas was hell.

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Why did the fat man cross the road? Because he felt that being overweight, he had to do something about it and go to the gym.

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A pregnant woman walks into a bar and miscarries.

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Why did the father leave work early on his son's birthday? He was rushed to the hospital after facing a severe heart attack due to a history of cardiovascular disease in his family.

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How do you make a 5 year old cry? Kill their parents.

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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What's worse that getting raped by a frog? That would never occur, as frogs do not have genitalia to commit rape.

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roses are red violets are blue show me your bed i wanna fuck you oh and roses are red violets are blue nice tits.

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Ask me if I'm a watermelon. Are you a watermelon? No...

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What's the best time to go to the dentist? When your tooth breaks or you need braces.

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what does this mean: qiwiw98373jeu7e nothing significant, just shows the results of a mentaly disable student

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Have you ever tried ethiopian food Neither have they

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Whatever tomorrow brings, I'll be there. Just kidding because today brought terminal cancer.

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Hey guess whats funny? Matthew Mcconaughey Oh wait, never mind

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An Irishman, a Jew, an Asian, and a Priest all walk into a bar This is an example of a well-balanced community

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Want to hear a joke? Obama

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Why did the boy throw the clock out of the window? Because it was broken.

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They say time heals all wounds, yet my leg still had to be amputated.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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