a man walks into a bar and buys a drink

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did the chick cross the road? To get to the brothel for hot lesbian love.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What did the prosecuting attorney say to the defense attorney? I hate you.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did the man apologize to the other man, after he had hit him with an axe? He didn't. The man was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic And so am I

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did the woman go in a elevator with Ray Rice? Because they were both going to the 25th floor and stairs would take too long.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did the man walk into the bar Because he was an acoholic

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Hitler, Mussilini, And Hideki Tojo Walk In To A Bar Mitzvah, Everyone Was Brutally Murdered & No One Survived.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Knock Knock -Who's there? No one -Ok

thumb_up thumb_down -1

"Knock knock" "Who's there?" "Fairy floss" "Fairy floss who?" "I'm sugar coating your Cancer diagnoses"

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did the Salesman leave the leper colony? He had to wish his daughter a happy birthday.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did Lisa let go of the monkey bars? she was being molested

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Ok is 25 really funnier than 24 because i think 8008 or 5318008 are way funnire tahn 24 or 35 just saying

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Whats scary about the asian man driving a car? He was blind

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What is the first letter of the alphabet? A. a B. 7 C. Mustard gas D. Because a penguin has 2 legs

thumb_up thumb_down -1

My ex wife looks like a pitbull.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did Susie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Susie!

thumb_up thumb_down -1

A working black man, Santa, and the Easter Bunny where walking down the street and find a penny, who picks it up? The working black man, Santa and the Easter Bunny take no payment for their work.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did the car crash? The driver was female.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

How do you drown a blonde? Put a scratch and sniff sticker at the bottom of the pool then don't let her come up for air.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

ugvvvvvv

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Q. What's the difference between a duck? A. One of its legs is both the same

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What makes the turtle move? It's legs.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops