A dyslexic man walks into a bra. He is promptly arrested for sexual harassment.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the street? A: Because that was the direction it was headed.

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The only time when white and black are together When I've just taken a shit! ?ttis

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What is worse then your car getting hijacked? A 900 pound man eating a Donut.

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Your momma's so stupid, she has a lower than average IQ!

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What is long, hard, and full of seamen? a school bus, if you consider children to be seamen

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What do you call cheese that's not yours? Not yours.

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Why can't Lake Mossman find his penis? Because he's a fat ass, and he doesn't have any arms.

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What did the little boy with a terminal illness get for Christmas? A gun

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A Finnish guy and a Russian guy go into a sauna. The Russian died.

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What did the apple say to the grape? Nothing, fruit are incapable of speaking

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What is the name of the car? What

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Why do women go to the bathroom together? To clean their filthy pussies.

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What did Batman say when he saw Robin? Hey look it's Robin

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jd and zach loves vigina

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There was once a little boy who started feeling sick. His mother gave him some soup. He died anyway.

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? He got many things, because everyone felt bad for him. Someone even brought him into their house so he could have Christmas dinner. On Christmas Day someone gave him fifty dollars to spend on food for his family. Only thing is, he didn't have a family.

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A guy walks into a bar with a parrot on his shoulder. The bartender says, "whered you get the pig?" The guy says, "It's not a pig its a parrot." The bartender says, "i was talking to the parrot."

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Two men are stranded in a structure on an alien planet, they are frightened when they are told that there is evidence of a life form near them, they explore their surroundings and find a snake-like creature that flares what looks like wings, bites one of the men on the hand and wraps its tail around his arm squeezing it until the arm breaks (we see the bone poke through his sleeve and he screams); the creature slithers up his sleeve, into his mask and lunges into his mouth killing him, and the other man is sprayed on the mask with acid and we see the plastic of the mask melt onto his face.

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How many 3 legged black Irish catholic obstetricians, walking into a bar, does it take to make a chicken cross the road? Fish!

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Ol-ive

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What did the retarded kid get for chrismas? Nothing the orphanage could not afford to give presents to all of the retarded children

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops