Why was the road crossed by the chicken? Because as an animal, incapable of understanding human languages and consequently lacking in education, it was unable to understand the convention of not using the passive voice in English prose writing.

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how do you make an idiot laugh? tell him a joke from antijoke

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What is white and weighs twice as much as Shamoo? My ass.

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A man went back in time and warned nobody about anything and pretended to be from the time he choose to go to and lived a happy life eventually finding a wife. He later found out he had a baby on the way, he named it after his great grandfather who was a war hero. He later found out that many years later his son had a son and they named it after his grandpa. He went to the hospital where he died just as his grandson had a baby and they named it after his father. The man died. End.

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How do you make an elephant float? Who cares?

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What do you call two lesbians in a canoe? Women.

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If all ziggles are zaggles and all zaggles are zumbles, then why is your mother a whore?

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If you can't see what I see... You must be blind. If you can see what I see... Well I can't be blind because I have been able to see all my life!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house... Knock, knock Who's there? The chicken.

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What's fat and round and has a ballsack nose? Mr Chicken

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What's long and sexy? The Eiffel Tower

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? the holocaust

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What did the drunk homeless man get for his birthday? Liver cancer.

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What's the difference between a grape and a duck? They're both purple, apart from the duck.

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An Irishman walked into a bar, except he would call it a pub, because there are slight differences in vocabulary in different regions, 37 minutes later he walked home safely, fed his cat, read some pages of a book he had been reading, turned the light off and went to bed.

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What did the Albino get for Christmas? Hair dye.

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Yo mama so fat she makes blind kids cry

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what has 8 legs, is brown, and will bite you? my crap

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Jack Stevens

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getting up in the morning is the 3nd hardest thing :DDD

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Why did Sally's ice cream melt? She was on fire.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because a black man was chasing his dinner.

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What did Jesse's friend say to Jesse? Hello Jesse

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What did Osama bin Laden say to Jesus? Nothing. He's in hell.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops