What is the same about a Duck and a Pickle? Neither of them can ride a bike.

Why did god create planet earth? He isn't real.

How did the little boy die? Malaria Why? He was poor. Why? A Jew stole his money.

"the president is black, my lambo's blue..." no hes not, hes bi-racial.

Your muma is so ugly she went to a ugly competition and got kicked out "no pros aloud".

Which is heavier, a tonne of feathers or a tonne of lead? It doesn't matter when your loved ones are being torn apart by bears.

Two peanuts are walking down the street. One of them was a salted Peanut

A man walks into a bar. He is an alcohol and it is killing his family.

A: Did you know that cashews come from a fruit? B: Not really. This is an interesting fact. Any other facts you have? A: yes ("A" was lying)

Simon says why the hell are we playing Simon say!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!

There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge asked "Mum, why is my name Fridge?" to which she replied "Because you deserve to be in one."

Roses are red Violets are blue I have altzhiemers Cheese on toast.

what did the blind kid boy get for Christmas? he doesn't know because his parents are mute.

what did the cat say to the dog? I turded out my crap hole

In Soviet Russia, man doesn't walk to the bar. The bar walks to the man!

Why do you have to write a conclusion at the end of your paper? So people dont have to read the whole thing.

what do you make if you get a cow, then kill it. ...Steak

whats the difference between harry potter and a jew? harry potter can escape the chamber

I asked her where you were.

Your mom is so stupid, she didn't know the answer to 2+5

What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? A mechanical wheelchair.

Whats big and red and eats rocks? A big red rockeater.

Why was it really gross when the blonde dove into the swimming pool? Because the swimming pool was full of phlegm!

a man walks into a bar, when he leaves he thinks he can hold his liquor and kills a mother and two children attempting to drive home.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...