What's worse then ten dead babies in a barrel? The one at the bottom is still alive.

Why didn't the man tip his waitress? Because he's a cheap bastard.

What did one cow say to the other? Moo.

You are right, the past still has its claws deep within me thank you friend.

Haikus are easy. But sometimes they don't make sense. Refrigerator.

What did the boy with cancer get for his birthday? Roses on his tombstone.

whats worse than getting raped by a giant scorpion? Gingers

How do you put elephant in refrigerator? Open the door, and put the elephant in

Santa Claus and eight reindeers walk into a bar. “Hey, fatty,” the barman shouts. “Where’s Rudolph?” “He’s dead,” Santa replied. “I’m sorry to hear that,” the barman said, looking embarrassed. “Let me get you a drink.”

Do you believe that if I theoretically am unmatched in many ways, would feel less alone if I decided to become more like the rest?

Why did the wolf cry boy? Cause he was a pedifile.

Knock Knock. You don't have a door.

What's 13 inches long and 3 inches wide and drives women crazy? My diick

1 white girl and 2 black men -TRAGIC

What do you get when a person and a cat try to have a child of some sort? Nothing because there chromosomes don't match, and there for physically impossible.

Your mom is so fat, when she farts, I can use her underwear as a hot air balloon

Sosiopath vs How I met your mother: BABABABABA BABABA RARARA LALALA ETC YOU GOT THE DRILL Kids, this is how I met your mother. I saw her at some store, I said "Hey sexy" She told me to fuck off, so I raped her, got out of prison years later, and kids, that is how I met your mother. ...Why I am leaving? Did I ever fucking say I was your father? I Just came here to tell you I raped and killed her after serving my time which was about 2 minutes, so kids, that is how I killed your mother. YOU ARE WELCOME BY THE WAY!Ungrateful kids. Moral of the story: If they are your kids, just say no and get away, and kill Robin for better television. Sociopath vs Grounded for life Moral: Shot the little kid, nobody will notice, not even his own family.Heck if you look at episode 34 you can see a tall handsome dude choking the life of a little boy in the background, and then letting him go just before he passes out and chokes him again? FUN FOR HOURS!

Q: Why don't chicken breasts have nipples? A: because if you freeze them, they will pop the package.

Even dyslexic people attend church and pray to Dog.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. He got hit by a car.

What did the group of black men do to the old white woman? Gave her back the purse she dropped.

Tunechi

What the hardest part of a vegetable to eat? The wheelchair.

Doctor doctor, I feel like a pair of curtains!" "Never-mind that, you've got AIDS.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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