Why did little Bobby put a firecracker in the dog's ass? Don't worry he used lube.

what would happen if you took all the veins out of your body and laid them out tip to tip? you die

What's the difference between an Elephant and a Post Box? An Elephant is not a Post Box. It is an Elephant.

Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?" The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." Then there is silence and a gun shot is heard. Back on the phone the guy says "I shot in the air and my friend heard it and moved. I think he's still alive." The operator says "Good that means he's still breathing and he's not dead."

How did the black man fall of the cliff? He was gazing over and realized he had Prostate cancer and fell off the cliif.

What did robin say to batman before they got I the car........ Get in the car.

A black man walks into a bar in an all white neighborhood. He has a couple of drinks, pays for them, and politely calls a taxi for a ride home.

Why was little Timmy mauled by a bear? He poked it with a pointy stick.

What do a reindeer and a grape have in common? They are both purple, except for the reindeer.

Two guys walk into a bar, have a good time, and exit the bar, relatively sober. They are driven home by a friend who agreed to be the designated drive for safety purposes and enjoy the rest of the evening with their wives, to whom they are happily married. Then the joke ends abruptly.

Why was the Mexican in the back of a pick up truck? There were not any available seats.

What noise does a Chinese roller coaster make? Chink Chink Chink Chink chink.....

What did Yoda say to Darth Vader? The only time the two had talked Darth Vader was still Anakin therefor, he said nothing.

Your momma is so old, she qualifies for multiple financial aid programs provided by the government.

How does a Chinese person wear a contact lens? On a 45 degree angle

Dam. Mothers Against Dyslexia.

Can you spot the polar bear Probably not because global warming killed it

There once was a mam from Peru He dreamed he was eating a shoe It wasn't... It was a goat

Why did the boy stop singing? Because his lungs collapsed.

What's the worst thing that can go wrong while trying to archieve something you desperately want? -Everything.

What do you call man with no limbs or a head? Your neighbor.

Why did the asian man crash? He fell asleep after a long 18 hour day of driving, plus he was listening to soothing soul music.

What happens when you Shoot a guy with a red Shirt On? He Dies.

What did the racist white guy say to the black guy? "I don't like Asians."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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