Hey! Have you ever heard of the Alzheimers joke?

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Why doesn't Helen Keller know how to drive? because she's a woman.

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Q. why did the boy who just had his first kiss feel no emotion? A. He got hit a Croquet mallet and died

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Q.Why did the dinosaur cross the road? A.Because chickens weren't invented then.

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How long can penguins hold their breath underwater? Long enough for you to eat a baby and then cover for it.

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How come dinosaurs don't talk? Because they're dead.

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what do you when a black guy gives you a muffin. you eat it because he was your waiter.

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what did batman say to robin to get him into the car? Get in the car

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Q: What does a psychic have in common with a stone? A: The bible decrees that psychics are witches and should be stoned and something topical about the stone.

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Why was Helen Keller a bad driver? She was blind.

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What's worse than finding out that your dog has worms? Finding out that you have worms.

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How many inches of snow are there when the fireplace burns for 10 minutes? Red chickens

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Why was the boy embarrassed when he opened his parents' bedroom door? Because he had been trying the door for several minutes until he realized he was pushing instead of pulling.

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What's worse than a paper cut? 2 paper cuts.

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Man U

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To save his soon to be butchered family.

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Why did the squirrel across the river upside down? So it could keep its nuts dry.

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What disease did Harry Styles get? 1Infection! (if you don't know, Harry Styles is 1direction's manager)

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Why did the Squirrel swim across the river upside down? To keep its nuts dry.

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Person 1 - Did you know there is only evidents of killer whales killing in captivity Person 2 - tell that to my uncle Pete... He's deaf

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A Jew walks into a bar, he buys it.

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My brother and I laugh at how competitive we used to be. But I laugh harder

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What do you call a college student who never studies? An irresponsible person

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A duct walks into a bar. The writer meant to write duck and then proceed to make a clever joke but instead a typo was made and a very unlikely occurence was writtern about considering air passages are not capable of walking and would most likely already be in the ceiling of the bar as too bring fresh air into the bar is important.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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