A praying mantis is very graceful

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Why is Lindsay Lohan out of prison? No, I'm asking.

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What do you call a black pilot? A PILOT

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There is a really funny joke which can only be seen by smart people, it goes as such:

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How many lemurs does it take to paint a wall? It depends on how hard you throw them.

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Why did I get thumbs up from everyone? Answer: Because they like my anti-joke.

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Q: What Did Alakazam Use To Listen Gangnam Style? A: He Used Psybeam.

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Knock knock! Who's there? A Doorbell salesman.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It tried. The chicken was run over by a distracted driver. The chicken turned out to be Farmer Brendan's prized egg hen who wandered away. The hen provided a large portion of Brendan's income and living. The farmer, deprived of his vital income source, was forced to sell his farm and live on the city streets.

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I have magical powers. Try your best to not to follow these instructions: Ready? Go. You are now blinking your eyes. (strike 1) You are now breathing voluntary. (strike 2) You suddenly have an itch somewhere on your body. (strike 3) You lost. Thanks for playing my little game. Hope you enjoy thinking of a flying pink elephant with wings.

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How do you kill a fat guy Keep giving him food he'll die eventually.

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What did the fish say when he swam into the wall? DAM!

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Knock Knock? Who's there? Sanderson. Sanderson who? You're boyfriend. Let me in. No, I'm a bit busy chopping up dead bodies. Come back in a bit. Oh let me help you! I like the way the blood runs out of the fresh ones!

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There are 3 guys, a fat guy, a skinny guy, and sexy guy. They all work together and have lunch together. The fat guy opens his bag and eats a ham and turkey sandwich. The skinny guy opens his bag and eats a tuna sandwich. The sexy guy opens his bag and eats an egg sandwich. The fat guy finishes his meal. The skinny guy saves half for later. The sexy guy ate more than half of his food. A genie magically appears. The End

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what did the baby say to his mum? he sed bfirbvuirnvkjwmndckie

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An alcoholic walks into a bar. He wakes up the next morning in a jail cell covered in blood. 3rd time this week.

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Why did Jerry Sandusky rape little boys? Because his penis was hard and he needed to get his nut off quick

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BAr intO a wAlks… sorry I wrote that joke after walking out of a bar.

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what do you get when you mix peanut butter and jelly? a sweaty black guy

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Let me guess, you where really ready to Not not tell me that.

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Whats worse than a pile of dead babies? A live on at the bottom.

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it was christmas and the kid waited all night. finally santa came.....

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A bar walked into a bar. Bars can't walk.

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Did you ever hear about that rich Mexican?? No. Yeah, me neither.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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