Hello penis

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Why did the teenager turn in his work on time? He chose not to procrastinate.

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What is the connection between a blonde and a halogen headlamp? There is none, one is a female human being with blonde hair and the other is a headlamp with a halogen lightbulb.

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Two peanuts are walking down the street. One of them was a salted Peanut

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A kid walks into a bar. He leaves wasted.

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How many lemurs does it take to paint a wall? It depends on how hard you throw them.

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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What do you get if you cross a bomb expert, and a homophobe a blow job

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A Christian asks god why there is so much pain and grief in the world. God does not exist.

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So there were three guys on a plane. they all died.

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Why did the man eat his cellphone? Because he has a serious mental disability, and did not know that it was not a normal thing to do, and for anybody to laugh at him for doing something like this is just a sick person.

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knock knock Who's there? Will Nealis Will Nealis who? Will nealis continuously finds himself crying himself to sleep as reality begins to smack himn in the face revealing to him that nobody has, does, or ever will like him. He is also informed that the reason his parents left him is because he is such a flaming ginger, his nasty face ruins the atmosphere of any room he walks in to. he has been adopted by a lovely gay couple and he takes after both of his fathers very much, in the aspect of enjoying massive animal c o c k in his mouth as well as having threesomes with his dads. will goes to school everyday and is tormented for being homosexual, so when he goes home hie parents beat him....off and have lemon partys with wills grandpa as he watches and masturbates vigourously.

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Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson are camping out. After they set up their tent and get inside to go to sleep, they look up at the stars. Holmes asks Watson to make a deduction. "Well, Holmes, I think it's highly probable that other planets outside our own, among those many stars up there, could have sentient life." Holmes points up and says, "Someone stole our tent, you idiot."

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Hey i just raped you and this is crazy so delete my number and keep the baby

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Whats gayer then dancing with the stars? Justin beiber

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DEAD ON KANE ITS BEEN ALL YOU ABD CAOIMHIN

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Why couldn't little Jimmy play catch with his dad? Because he was an orphan.

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once, my friend said hi. i said hi back

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Why did the college student post unfunny anti-jokes on anti-joke.com? Because he was bored shitless.

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A devout Christian dies. Peter winks as his soul passes through the impenetrable Gates of Heaven. Everyone is gay and– like, gay as in happy– Fags aren't allowed in Heaven.

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Why did the man jump off the cliff? Because he suffered from chronic depression as a result of frequent drug abuse.

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knock knock. who is there ? nobody.you have no friends.

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Have you heard about the constipated mathematician? He worked his problems out with a pencil... It was a #2 pencil

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Your muma is so ugly she went to a ugly competition and got kicked out "no pros aloud".

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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