Pilot: We need to lighten the load of this plane Italian: I'll throw out these pizzas, there are too many of them in my country Mexican: I will throw out these tacos, there are just too many of them in my country The american stares in horror at the two men, the pizza and tacos were their only food and they were lost in the Himalayas.

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Why was the unemployed dolphin trainer so sad? His life has no purpoise. In an unrelated topic, how is he unemployed id he is a dolphin trainer?

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Guy1: Hey! Do you want to hear a potassium joke? Guy2: Sure! Guy1: K

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A woman walks into a bar.

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What's sad about 4 black people in a Cadillac going over a cliff? It was my car.

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What did one dog say to the other? Nothing silly...dogs can't talk.

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How many cows does it take to swim on land? 4.2

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Why did Michael Jackson retire from basketball? Michael Jackson never played basketball, but was nonetheless one of the most successful musicians to ever live.

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Why is Coldplay really big in Japan? They're tall guys.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? I am. I am who? You are you.

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I'm a burrito... With a big shirt.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, What the **** did i just do? I have no clue......

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What does Osama Bin Laden and the typical Western man have in common? Extensively modern p.o.r.n-o collections.

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your friend: i did ur mom you: jokes on u my moms gross friend:.....

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What happen to the guy who stole the TV. He runs away as he fears the person that stoled his/her TV reports him/her to the police.

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A homeless guy walked up to me and said "Any change?", to which I replied, "Nope, your still homeless". We laughed and laughed. The he stabbed me.

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Why couldn't the cat drink it's milk? Because it didn't have a face.

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why did the dead baby cross the road? it was stapled to the chicken

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Is it closer to Minneapolis, or by bus?

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Why did the man eat his own shoe? Because it was a tissue box.

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Why did the woman make so many sandwiches? She was a mother catering for her child's sporting event.

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What did the pilot say to the female flight attendant? He told her to never tell his wife about the time they spent in mexico or he'd bludgeon her to death with a hammer.

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Know what im sayin'? No but im wearing pants

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Whats worse than stubbing your toe? Getting shot.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops