A man and wife were having a vacation when suddenly the man falls to the floor and starts having a seizure. The woman screams "Oh my God, is there a doctor in the house?!" Then a doctor appears and helps the man with the appropriate method of handling a seizure. The doctor says everything is going to be okay.

what do you say to your girlfriend just after the best sex you ever had? I really got great value for money tonight with my prostitute sweety. You should have been there

There was an apartment. At the bottom level lived a white family, The 2nd level, there was a mexican family, and the 3rd level, there was a Black family. Someone blew up the apartment with a bomb, WHO SURVIVED? The white family, because the parent were at work and the kids were at school.

Nothing is as strong as love, Except a nuclear warhead that can destroy entire cities! :P thoko like :D ~~k0mradey``

Why did the chicken cross the road?? Blue.

What did the Colombian say to the Peruvian? Quieres lleyo?

Man hears son masturbating in room. The dad enters the room and tells him "Son if you keep jacking off you will go blind". The boy replies "Dad I"m over here".

Knock. Knock. Who's there? Anonymous. Anonymous who? Exactly.

Whats worse than getting shot? Getting shot twice.

what did the man say to the doctor? how the hell would i know, ask him yourself.

what do u say when u meet somebody new hello

A man begged for forgiveness, for a sin commited Jesus forgave him, Jesus loves you

My granddad fell down the stairs the other day... Yeh, we didn't find it very funny either.

What did the chicken say when it finally crossed the road? - nothing, its a chicken

What do you call a Muslim Extremest at the bottom of the ocean? A terrible tragedy for the Muslim community.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Daisy's are white, Metallica.

A cat walks into a bar. The bartender says "What would you like to drink?" The cat says "Meow."

What happens when Lord Voldemort tries to kill Harry Potter? He is unsuccessful.

Why was the black Jew sad? He had to sit at the back of the oven

Wanna hear a race joke?.....whoops, ya missed it

What did the girl get with no arms and no legs get for christmas? Cancer.

roses are red violets are blue i have five fingers the middle ones for you

What did the shark say to the beached whale? Nothing.

What is Alqueida's favorite football team? The New York Jets.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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