What do you call a panda without a head? Dead.

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A mathematician, a physicist, and an engineer walk into a bar. They order some drinks, sit quietly and stare at their shoes until they've finished their drinks, then go back home and wallow in loneliness, wishing their social skills weren't so abysmal.

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Why doesn't McDonald's sell hot dogs? They don't want to advertise for McWeenies.

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steven hawking walks into a bar

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what this: b a dead one of these: p

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what do you call a gay guy? kevin

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Irune. Irune who? Irune my life with all this red sand.

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Whats fuzzy and pink? A pink fuzz ball

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Q: What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? A: Pfft. Stupid. Apples are for healthy people. Go for the ice cream. There's no worms in that.

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Did you go swimming in the Carribean Ocean? Yes, a shark ate my body, and killed me! Thank God I'm still alive!

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What was the last thing that went into the head of the space pilot of the Challenger shuttle right before it crashed? He was probably thinking about his wife and family...

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Something strange in you're neighborhood. Who you gonna call? The police.

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I like my coffee like I like my slaves... Free

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I got pussies, cocks, asses and bitches. In my animal store.

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yo momma is so fat that she contributes to americas obesity problem

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But there's a sound Dumbledore knows... What does the Fawkes say?

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What do you do when you find a blonde on her knees? Help her up, because obviously she has fallen.

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Why did they bury the fireman at the side of the hill? Because he was dead

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Roses are nice, violets are fine, ill be the 6, if you be the 9!

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Did you hear about the homosexual that walked out of a hospital? He just found out he was HIV positive. (ic3)

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When life gives you Pure Filtered Water, Sweeteners (High Fructose Corn Syrup, Sugar), Lemon Juice from Concentrate, Less Than 0.5% of Each: Natural Flavors, Citric Acid (Provides Tartness), Modified Cornstarch, Glycerol Ester of Wood Rosin, Sodium Hexametaphosphate and Sodium Benzoate and Potassium Sorbate and Edta (to Protect Taste), Red 40 Make Lemonade.

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Why can't Stevie Wonder read? Clearly the only answer is because he's blind

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Hitler walks in to pizza pizza, the manager asks how many? L

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yo mammas so fat when she runs the world spins faster

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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