what's worse than than finding a worm up your ass? Death

How many rats does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two. But they have to be really small.

Why did the baby die? Because he was shot in the head repeatedly

What did the white man say to the group of mexicans when a golf ball was coming toward them? 4!

Chuck Norris is dead......

whats worse than failing your maths test?

"So, what do you fancy doing tonight?" "Does it matter? We'll end up doing what you want anyway..."

roses are red, violets are blue, I have schizophrenia, which is a serious mental disorder in which I have difficulty properly experiencing reality. It should not be confused with multiple personality disorder, which is a completely different disease with different symptoms.

How do you stop R Kelly from peeing on little girls? Kill all little girls.

* Are you deaf? * Yes, as I love paradoxes.

Bob has 80 chocolate bars, he gives 5 to his uncle,10 to his mother and 8 to his freind. He then eats 40 chocolate bars. Q. How many chocolate bars has bob got left now? A. Bob has no chocolate bars left. Shortly after Bob ate 40 bars he was diagnosed with diabetes. He then died of a heart attack due to high cholesterol.

What's worse than stubbing your toe? - AIDS. What's worse than AIDS? - Getting AIDS and stubbing your toe.

Q: why was the gay guy sad A: Becasue he was stright.

What has nine arms and sucks? Four children with two arms snacking on a lollipop, and one child with one arm snacking on a lollipop.

Why can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't Why can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllpeople tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't Why can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllpeople tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't Why can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllpeople tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't Why can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllpeople tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllll

Optimist: The glass is half full. Pessimist: The glass is half empty. Realist: Find something better to do than talk about a glass.

What did Chuck Testa do when he saw she had died of a heart attack? He cried and gave her a proper funeral and burial.

Sally heard a scream in a dark room and went to go see who it was. Knock Knock! Who's there? Not Sally...

Paul was mowing his lawn when he felt a bump. It turned out it was a bunny. Paul felt bad but the bunny felt worse

What's the most confusing day in Mexico? Father's Day.

A horse enters a bar. The bartender looks at the horse and says "Why the harness?"

Why did the man punch NUGE in the face? Because he got angry that NUGE was being such a BA person and he was jealous of NUGE'S style and he just got dumped by his ugly as poop mom which was eating Anti Chicken.

eat a hot dog

Why didn't the man walk done the stairs? Because he had no legs

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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