When life gives you lemons squeeze them at people then run away.

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What's the difference between roast beef and pea soup? You can't drown babies in roast beef.

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What did the big Chimney say to the little Chimney? Nothing they are chimneys ....

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Q:Why was 6 afraid of seven? A:Because seven ate (eight) nine

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I was going to type an anti-joke but I totally forgot how it starts. It goes something like something something something something something your mom's a whore.

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Me: "If I had Alzheimers, I would break down into tears." Friend: "Why, you would forget why you were crying..." Me: "Who are you again?"

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5 Italian guys from Long Island

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Why did an old man cause a car accident? He gotf a heart attack.

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What do you call an alligator wearing a vest? An extremely talented reptile.

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What did the boy with no arms or legs get for Christmas many gift card to stores he liked

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What song did Buddy the elf sing for Santa on his birthday? Happy birthday

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women drivers>asian drivers>asian women drivers

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Q: What did osama bin laden say to the worker behind the gas station counter? A: May I buy this bag of chips?

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What's the difference between a good anti joke, and a bad anti joke? There literally is no good anti joke.

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How do you get a camel out of a desert? a helicopter

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Your mum is dead, Just fucking with you! Kelvin Yang.

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Whats a black and white and red all over? i dont know...who spends their time researching this kind of stuff

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why did susie fall off the dollar coaster? it only cost 50 cents susie is gone now

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Johnny: One day dad i will be tall like you! (Later that day johnny was found dead in a garbage bag)

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Calling your penis a chose because it's small and fat.

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What do you call a Mexican? Whatever his name is you racist.

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Honey, it really is such a tragedy that my sense of sight doesn't function properly. I've missed out on many beautiful things in my lifetime.

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Simon: Knock Knock Alfredo: Who's there? Simon: Wire Alfredo: Wire Who SImon? Simon: Wire are you asking me this!!!!

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Coming this fall, A hilarious movie for the whole family to enjoy, actor Rob Schneider play a very normal man would goes to work everyday to support his family who he loves more than anything in the world, critics are saying that this is the most vulgar slapstick comedy of the year as Rob Schneider teaches his two adopted kids the power of Jesus Christ. Coming this fall... The Nun's Birthday Rated R for excessive nudity of Rob Schneider and an asian hooker.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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