A man walks into a bar. Splash.

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A man walks into a bar and the bartender suddenly runs out the door frantically yelling, "He's got a gun! He's got a gun!" Meanwhile, inside the bar, the patrons overpowered the gunman, tied him up and took his weapon and all the cash he had. They later used his money to buy more drinks at another bar.

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How do you drown a blonde? Same as anyone else. Tie three-hundred cinder blocks to her and drop her into a lake.

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So there is a muslum, then he flew a plane into a building and died a sudden death. But he was wearing a helmet.

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knock knock who`s there me oh come in

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What did the paralyzed kid get for his 18th birthday? A boner.

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what is green and has weels? grass i was kidding about the weels.

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"Knock Knock" "Just ring the bloody bell for once!"

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Why did the gay kid drop his ice cream Because he got punched in the face.

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ill take a bullet for you... on call of duty... nahhh that ruins my kd

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What happens when u mix water and soda? You get watery soda

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what did the girl say after she got hit by a bus, nothing she was dead

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What color do you wear if you're in the NAVY? Beige, white, sometimes camouflage - really, it depends on your rank and the situation.

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An Irishman walks out of a bar.

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Q: What did the psychopath dream about? A: An insane chimpanzee kicking his head off, or maybe something normal

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My mom farted, she also has Alzheimer's, I also have Alzheimer's. Also pizza didn't like it

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How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They beat her mercilessly.

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Why did nobody bother to help the old lady cross the road? Because her actions in recent years had given rise to considerable division and ill-feeling within the community.

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A Jew walking in the street sees a homeless person asking for charity. He reaches to his pocket, grabs a penny, greets her with a nice smile and gives away the penny.

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Why does austin bell like it up the butt? Cause he's a cat a kitty cat meow meow meow and meow meow meow

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Faithful men.

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Why did the Christian man dislike gays? Because Christianity views being gay as a sin, and as a follower of the religion he decided he did not like gays.

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What happens when an alien goes out in the rain It gets wet

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what did "A" and "B" look for when they went to the beach? what are you talking about? letters cannot travel!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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