A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "why the long face?" The horse replies "my whole family was killed in 911... And I used the money I got from life insurance to get plastic surgery to always have a smile on my face. My doctor botched the surgery, so now my face is elongated. Even for a horse, of course."

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A blonde walks into a bar. She enjoys a refreshing, cold beverage with friends before returning home to sleep ahead of another day of hard work as a scientist.

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What's the best way to piss off a feminist? R@pe her.

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2 sheeps are outside having a great time One sheep walks up to the other sheep and says: hello The other sheep says: hello Now what I want to know: what ally do you get your drugs from

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Whats red and smells like Bacon. Bacon

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why are anti jokes so funny? cuz u pobably just laughed at this one.

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that awkward moment when there is no candy in the van.....

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Q. What is the difference between an ass kisser and a brown noser? A. Depth Perception.

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So theres a Black guy, White guy and Mexican guy all sitting at a bar. They were friends.

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How many cows does it take to screw in a light bulb? Either one super cow or none because cows don't even have apposable thumbs

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Congratulations, sir. The judge has determined that the charges of traffic violation against you were indeed incorrect, and you will be given a large sum of cash for your wasted time.

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Your mother is so fat.

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George Bush told Jared Fogle that he did 9/11. Jared Fogle replied "I did 9 11 year olds"

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How many dead babies can you fit in the trunk of a car? Any number if compressed sufficiently. At neutron star density all babies in the world would fit.

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Truth is Jordan Abu aita has a hairy @ss

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why couldnt the african child eat enough food? he didnt have a mouth.

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A horse walks into a bar. It doesn't order anything or say anything because it is a horse. It proceeds to walk around and knock over a few tables before finding the door.

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Two black guys walk into a bar. They had too much alcoholic substances and got alcohol poisoning. Their families mourned for days and their kids grew u without a father. The end.

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why did the bear cross the road? to get cream cheese.

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Every first letter of an innappropriate body part is how it actually looks like: Penis, Vagina, Boobs

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Why did jimmy fall off the swing? He had no arms or legs Knock knock Who's there? Not jimmy

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How do you keep an idiot in suspense? You watch a suspenseful TV program and pause at the right moment.

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How do you make a Cowboy cry? You kill his family.

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Theres a tomatoe a cucumber and a mouth. HA

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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