What did the red apple say when it saw a black man an irish man, and an asian walk into a bar? nothing apples cant talk.

How does a doctor wake up in the morning He opens his eyes

Why was the man so angry? Because the woman was not in the kitchen

Black, I dont know if you are kidding around or something, but I cant reach you on the phone pal, I am really sorry about the Valium, it was like only 10 milligrams pal, I mean please man, it was a joke, and Ill break up with Line anyways, I mean Alex and Petter are sorry too okay? Just take the phone, ill be there soon, I mean come on, you are the most cruel person I know, lets talk about it

Q: Why did Suzie fall out the swings? A: She had no arms. Knock Knock! Who's there? Not Suzie.....

What did the man with one eye say to the woman with one leg at 2 p.m? Good afternoon.

whats the difference between a thousand dead babies and a porshe? i dont have a porshe in my garage

A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

Why can't dinosaurs talk? Because they're all dead

Why did the chicken cross the road? Why? To get to your house. Knock knock. Who's there? The chicken.

What do you callan african american in KFC? A had working american with a average profit, trying to make a living.

Tyrone is innocent! I can't wait until Kirsty gets hers!

What did the orphan get for christmas? Cancer.

How are leprechauns and lions similar? The both start with L.

Your mom is so dirty, She smells.

Why was the man so cold? He was in a fridge

knock knock. who's there? Kony. Kony who? Kony says:" Uganda be abducted"

How does Helen Keller play the piano? With one hand.. She needs the other hand to sing.

Why did the airplane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread

Whats the difference between a Ferrari and an erection? I dont have a Ferrari!!

why did the plane crash? because the pilot was a tomato.

Q. Why couldn't Billy see the pirate movie? A. Because his mom didn't let him.

Two blonds walk into a bar, the brunette ducked

Knock Knock who's there its black george washington.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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