A black man walks into a bar full of white people. And then... He orders his drink.

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a screaming goat

When my parents said that they chucked a flipper baby into the Atlantic ocean I assumed a baby seal, I later found out that happened to my disabled brother.

Q: Why shouldn't you walk under a ladder? A: Because it could fall on top of you. Be a reasonable human being and just fly OVER the ladder.

Justin Bieber tries to get into a club but is not allowed because he is to young.

How did the girl cross the road? -She didn't, she died because she was blind and didn't see the "don't walk" sign.

What do you call five black me pushing a car? "Very nice young men who helped me when I broke down," according to my grandmother.

What kind of mother doesn't do laundry? A dead one.

What do you call an asian jumping off of a building? A suicide victim.

If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

How do you tell identical twins apart? You can't. They look identical.

If there's somethin' strange in your neighborhood Who ya gonna call 911

- Knock knock. - Who's there? - Jehovah - Jehovah who? - Jehovah's Witness - Go f*** yourself.

I am green. You are blue. Jokes are infinite. This is too.

When I see the Viagra commercial telling you about all the side effects and they say "if you have an erection lasting for more than 4 hours, call a doctor." If I have an erection that lasts that long, I'm not calling a doctor. I'm calling my mom; who I always call when I'm sick.

If a tree falls on a woman and there is no one around to hear it, she was probably lonely.

a lazy boy sleeps 23/24 hours. what does he do in the remaining hour ? he takes a nap

What would a gay man do with a jelly doughnut? Thoroughly enjoy its fruity taste.

Wanna hear a joke? no

Roses are red Violets are? blue Lets eat poo I know you want to

What is yellow and dangerous? Shark infested butter

What did the T-Rex say to the chicken? Nothing. First of all because the Tyrannousaurus Rex has been extinct for over 65 million years and secondly because Tyrannousaurus Rex's and chickens are both animals of lower intelligence so they cannot talk to one another.

Why did the black man die? Kidney Failure.

Two Muffins are in an oven the first Muffin says "whew it's hot in here." The other Muffin turns around and yells "Holy shit a talking Muffin."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...