A red and blue penguin are taking showers. The red penguin can't find the soap so he yells down the hall to the blue penguin "Hey, where is my soap?" The blue penguin replies, "What do I look like a typewriter?"

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Inbreeding is really funny if you think about...

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Person 1 Hey man what's up Person 2 nothing much I just impregnated your mom

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Q-What did the blonde say when I stomped on her toe? A: asdfsdflsdrfjkofweønaweøiofioawef, .Would you be ever so kind to move your foot as it is currently in a position of where it causes my nerves to send pain impulses to my brain. Thanks

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whats wores than eating a vag. a gaint vag eating you.

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Why couldn't jack join the football team? Jack has down syndrome

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There was a little boy and a little girl in a bathtub having a bath. Suddenly the little girl looked down at the boy. "Can I touch it?" "No way -- you already broke yours off!"

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Why didn't little Timmy see the bus right before it hit him? Because he was blind

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Q; why did the German ask the Jew to go in his shower? A; because the Jew had stayed the night at the Germans house.

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Whats worse that having cold soup? Cancer

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Q:How do you get better at boxing? A:Get a bigger package Daniel W. Schnurr

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Roses are grey Violettes are grey I am colour blind And I suck at rhymes

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So the word RAPING does not work unless you type it in caps? Raping... Did it censor? No? Never mind then... Wow, catchphra Never mind... Its a sign X-files theme.... Teleports at your house: Hah bitch never you ugly, or not ugly enough... Urgh, nevermind, I mean some ugly chicks know their stuff but you know... Anyway NeroMetal The sociopath not the fucking Cultist piece of shit that use my morals as a code system? YOU THINK WE THE SAME? EEEEEEH! Me raping you says we are not... And ill find you ;) Or your sister or your mom, I mean h0m0? You think im a pervert or something?

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What's brown and rhymes with snoop? Dr. Dre.

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Q: What said the first bagel to the other? A: Nothing! Bagels can't talk!

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do you know what Noah didn't bring on his arc? unicorns

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A blind man walks into a bar, bystanders help him up.

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What would a gay man do with a jelly doughnut? Thoroughly enjoy its fruity taste.

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What is an Indian's favourite country? North Currya

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Why did the turtle take so long on his run? Because he never went on a run he walked.

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What did the penguin do in the desert? Die.

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How did the guy fall off the roof? He was pushed

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Why couldn't the black man be an astronaut? He was not qualified for the Job

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: No one knows because a chicken is incapable of communicating it's reason to humans.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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