Q: How do you catch a squirrel? A: Throw a fridge at it

What do you call a gay man? Phil Krahn

A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

I saw a shooting star. It shot me.

Why did Visellet stop eating cherries? Because she choked on a pit and died.

Obama = ebola

Knock Knock I have a f*cking doorbell you asshole

knock knock who's there? your destiny

How do you cheat your friend up Throw a BRIC at her face.

All dogs are mammals. All cats are mammals. Therefore, all dogs are cats.

Your mommas so stupid she decided to go to night school to better her self. She got a degree in business and finance and is now a manager for HSBC

Whatever tomorrow brings, I'll be there. Just kidding because today brought terminal cancer.

Knock knock. "Whose there?" "Dave" Oh alright Dave, two seconds I have got to unlock the door~looks for and finds keys and unlocks door~ Hello Dave, sorry mate not been out yet so not been out, come in.........

What was Jenna's favourite ice cream flavour? Keyword; was, she's dead now

A black guy and a white girl are having sex. The white girl screams "I'm pregnant!!!!" The black guy says "i'll help you take care of it" "I love you sweetie and nothing will come between us"

ure mama's so fat

I like school Said no one ever.

What does the thirsty butcher drink? Chocolate milk. Because he can.

What's the difference between a clever trick and a computer programmer? A clever trick throws you for a loop, and a computer programmer throws you a for loop.

Why was Joe afraid of Steve? Because Steve raped and killed all of Joe's three children two weeks ago.

Q: How pregnancy test is performed in Somalia?! A: Shove a piece of bread between the legs of the women and if the bread is bitten when you take it out, she is pregnant!

Once upon a time there was a young teenager who was bullied a lot. She died 100 years ago.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Lebron traveled

Knock Knock. Who's There? Orange. Orange Who? No, this is Homeland Security. We have raised the current terrorism threat level to Orange, which means there is a high risk of terrorist attacks. Please report any suspicious behavior.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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