If little jimmy has five candy bars and he eats three, what does little jimmy have? Diabetes

A student goes up to the teacher because he has to go to the washroom. The teacher tells him that he has to sing the ABC's before he can go. So the boy sings, "ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ." The teacher said he did a perfect job and could go to the washroom. The boy went on to become a billionaire. Congrats!

Roses are Red Violets are Blue If you think this is gonna rhyme, You're dead wrong.

yo mamas so ugly.... everyone died. the end.

Q: Why did the boy fall off his bicycle? A: Because someone threw a fridge at him.

Whats funnier than a black man? A black president

knock knock, who's there me me who he opens the door a kills yo

pretty soon we'll all be dead

In Soviet Russia, this type of joke would be considered evidence to throw you into the gulag.

Technically rainbows are white.....and have gold at the end.

What is the difference between a pizza and a Jew?

Why is six afraid of seven? Six isn't actually afraid of seven. It is true that seven devoured nine's carcass, but one has to understand that cannibalism is not a taboo in their culture. In the world of cardinal numbers, protein is precious and leaving corpses to rot is dangerously unsanitary. You should not judge them by the standards of human society. It's ignorant and offensive.

If Jewish men light a menorah during Hanukkah, what do Jewish women light? Jewish women light a menorah as well; Judaism is a relatively fair religion to both sexes.

Why couldn't the driver start his car? Because the driver was a tree

Polly went out for a fag. Then she was raped.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the gay boys house. Knock knock! whose there? The chicken!!

Knock Knock. Who's there? Boo. Boo who? No I said Lou. Oh hey Lou come on in.

Why was Blue looking for her clue. She was drugged by a stranger and ended up inside of Mailbox.

Where was sally during the bombing? Everywhere!

You can talk the talk - but can you walk the walk?

* two sisters are making yo mama jokes* * mom turns around* mom: Hey yo mama so stupid ... sister one: ummmm.... sister two: sure thats not you?

What's yellow and smells like cheese? Cheese.

An Englishman, a Scotsman and a Welshman are all in the Great Britain Olympic squad,

What's green and has wheels? grass... i lied about the wheels

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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