What starts with 'd' and ends in 'ick'? dick -XH

thumb_up thumb_down -41

A lady was walking to the grocery store as she was walking she saw a old lady with a dog behind them where two black merses and about 200 women behind the merses. The lady Rushes over and ask '' Maim i am sorry to bother you but i would like to know who you lost and how?'' The old lady paused for a minute and awnsered '' I lost my husband and mother in law, Well My husband had just walked in to the house and my new dog went and ferousiously atacted him my mother in law had been living with us at the time she the jumped in and tried to help him They both died because of blood loss'' The lady looked at her with simpathy and thought i feel sorry for her husband and his mother she then asked '' Can i barrow your dog'' the old lady looked puzzled and said '' Get in line '' The lady walked to the end of the line as the dog was Passed to a women and taken home then passed back. When the women got her turn she thought do i want to kill my husband then she thought yes

thumb_up thumb_down -41

1)Roses are red... 2)5 black men... 3)dead babies walk into a large crowded bar before dissolving into oblivion at the literary incongruency 4)of the whole situation.... 5)yes chicken got to the other side BEFORE me #)stupid chicken (aka duck rose man help....)

thumb_up thumb_down -41

Why did the ship get lost at sea? The captain was a piece of bread.

thumb_up thumb_down -41

if you write treehouse backwards it spells gullible.

thumb_up thumb_down -41

Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, I Have 5 Fingers The Middle One's For You!! :D

thumb_up thumb_down -41

what is so funny about billy? nothing he is dead and if you laught at him you are the biggest jerk by: Brennan pickrell

thumb_up thumb_down -41

Knock knock Who's there? Knock Knock I said who's there? My name is Knock Knock Oh hi Knock Knock, come in

thumb_up thumb_down -41

Jesse gets so many ladies

thumb_up thumb_down -41

Kindness is what makes the world go round..... and chocolate.

thumb_up thumb_down -41

Just because you do not see the joke, it does`t mean its not here... Ps: It helps us get hookers and beers while wasting your "valuable time" OMG PLEASE BE FUCKING UNDERSTANDING OHMYLAWD!!!!!!!!! Ps: Cry harder you greedy sons of shedogs

thumb_up thumb_down -43

A penguin walks into a bakery. The baker asks the penguin: "What kind of bread would you like? Brown or white?". Penguins answers: "Well, it doesn't really matter since I came here by car!".

thumb_up thumb_down -43

How do you perform CPR on a black person. OK, first come down. I wish I could ask why you turned to Anit Jokes.com to ask this question, but this is serious. First, check for any air blockages using two fingers, then...

thumb_up thumb_down -43

if you have a name/nickname/brand/version or number, please like this anti joke

thumb_up thumb_down -43

What did the radiator say to the carpet? Nothing, a radiator is an inanimate object, and therefore is unable to speak.

thumb_up thumb_down -43

A plane crashed in the rainforest. The survivors all buried themselves because no survival equipment was left and they all sought to kill themselves in their deep state of shock and fear.

thumb_up thumb_down -45

24

thumb_up thumb_down -45

why did the girl cross the road? no one knows because she was hit with a car and died on impact.

thumb_up thumb_down -45

a dog jumping up and catching a frisbi

thumb_up thumb_down -45

I told my doctor I’m the first man on the face of the earth to suffer from morning sickness. He promptly corrected my mistake; my excessive vomiting is actually caused by chemo.

thumb_up thumb_down -45

what did the jew say to the other jew in WWII?..... "We're both going to die."

thumb_up thumb_down -45

This will be the least popular anti-joke. Dislike this joke.

thumb_up thumb_down -45

If your dying how would you avoid getting eaten alive by sharks or rip to shreds by a T-Rex? Fall on a sword

thumb_up thumb_down -47

yo momma so fat that she needs to lose weight

thumb_up thumb_down -49

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops