I went to the local RSPCA office today....it's tiny, you couldnt swing a cat in it.

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What's the difference between an elephant and a plum? Their color. What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the elephants over the hill. What did Jane say when she saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the plums over the hill. She was color blind.

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Why did the boy fall off his bike? Because someone threw a fridge at him.

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Roses are red Violets are blue My walls are yellow

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Whats the difference between a black man and a bucket of shit? The bucket.

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What do you call a black man on the moon?? Never going to happen

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you need 2 pple for this. Ask me if im a tree? Are you a tree? no

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What do Lincoln, JFK, and Barack Obama all have in common? They were all president of the United States of America and are relatively good people.

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Roses are stools, Violets are bums, sugar is knit, thank you, LSD.

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a blonde, brunette and a red head are all goin to jump off a bridge and turn into something. the brunette jumps and says fish, and she turns into a fish. the red head says eagle and becomes an eagle. the blonde gets a running start, but then trips on the way off and she says shit and turns into a piece of shit.

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A man walks into a bar. Splash.

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What did the towel say to the other towel? Nothing, there was no topic of conversation.

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What did the man do when he crossed the road? Nothing he got hit by a car

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What did the homeless guy get for Christmas ? Frostbite

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what kind of mexicans are NOT in the U.S. -legal

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a gay guy is in a club, from across the room he sees another attractive man with now shirt and he gets an erection.

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What's dry and unpleasant to eat? Sand.

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? because it got shot before it could get there.

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I was about to do an triathlon, but i took an arrow to the knee. It got infected and i promptly died two days later.

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Lil Wayne

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I once saw a fat child eating a sandwich. I wondered what was inside.

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You know its time to leave when she wake's up out of her coma and your balls are on her chin.

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What did the red bag have written on it? Yellow bag

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How to make a plummer cry Kill his family

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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