*Knock knock* "Who's there?" "Would you mind turning your music down a bit please? I have reports to write."

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What would Osama Bin Laden be doing if he were alive today? Drowning

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Why do so many people like writting really bad anti jokes? Said Santa Claus

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Have ever seen Helen Keller's house? No. Neither has she.

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So this guy walks into a bar and– Nevermind it's really not that funny.

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I would tell you a joke about a blunt pencil but it's pointless

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A musician without any music walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Who do you think you are, a hobbit?" The musician without any music says,"yeah" and turns into a hobbit

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WHY IS THIS SENTENCE CAPITALIZED? BECAUSE CAPS LOCK IS ON.

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Who is yellow and cant drive straight. A man dying of lukemia

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Why did the stoner visit anti-joke.com? Because he was bored, and probably kinda high.

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Violets are blue and/or violet Roses are red so's my blood, see?

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*there was a tv sitting on the side of the road..* person 1: hey why doesn't that tv work? person 2: because it's broken?? person 1: no..because its not plugged in!

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Dumbledore dies.

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i'm hard

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Your'e probably not going to laugh at this joke, it wasn't made to be funny

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How many children does it take to kill a homocidal killer? None. Children should not attempt such a dangerous task.

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Justin with a hat.

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An English couple walk int a Portuguese bar. They never see their daughter again.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To go to the buchter.

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What's the difference between roast beef and pea soup? You can't drown babies in roast beef.

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What is the difference between a trampoline and a baby? You take your boots of before jumping on the trampoline!!!!!!!!!

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what did the blind man get for christmas? Cancer.....

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A man goes to the pound to adopt a dog and sees a very shaggy dog and says "WOW! Thats a shaggy dog I'll take it!" So the man takes home his new dog and decides to enter the dog in the towns anual shaggy dog contest. and wins. After winning the town shaggy dog contest he moves up to the county shaggy dog contest. theres no competition. Now the man and his dog enter into the state shaggy dog contest, the states shaggiest dogs are all competing. the man wins. Finally the man and his dog are in the prestigious national shaggy dog contest. The judge walks up to the man and says "your dog isn't very shaggy"

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A Polish immigrant goes to the Department of Motor Vehicles to apply for a driver’s license. He has to take an eye test. They show him a card with the letters C Z W I X N O S T A C Z. “Can you read this?” the optician asks. “Read it?” the Polish guy replies, “No, sir. Allow me to put on my glasses."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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