Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have schizophrenic, and don't have any friends

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What do you call a white man without a face? Dead. What do you call a black man without a head? Negger.

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In Soviet Russia, the same thing that happens here, happens there.

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WOKE UP THIS MORNING AND SAW PROSTITUTE OUT THE WINDOW AND SAID GRANDMA GRANDMA CAN I GO PLAY WITH THAT PROSTITUTE SHE SAID NO YOU CAN PLAY WITH ME BECAUSE I'M A PROSTITUTE TOO

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Person A "did you hear about the cure for AIDS?" Person B "no." Person A "neither did I."

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What did the little boy get for Christmas? Nothing, he's Jewish

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What do you call a black guy that flies a plane? A pilot.

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What did the fat man order at McDonalds? Nothing, he was on a diet

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Q. Why did the fence break? A. Too many mexicans were climbing it.

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Why did the chicken cross the road. To get to the other side. Original anti joke.

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what did the asian say to the other asian "where both asian"

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What do you get when you cross a Dachshund and a Nazi? Bestiality. Ew.

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Why doesn't a ducks quack echo? Actually, it does, but the echo is imperceptible to human ears.

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My dad weights 350 lbs. He decided to switch to diet soda.

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You remind me of something What? Monday Why? Nobody likes you

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What did Batman say when he saw Robin? Hey look it's Robin

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A man walks into a bar and says, "Hey, Jim, your wife just died from terminal cancer." Jim then says, "Cool. Hey, do you know if the games on tonight?"

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If you say "Hi" to every tree you pass, is that being environmentally friendly?

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I rode in to town on an ass... ur momas ass!!

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A cyclist looses control in a race. How does he stop? Run into the spectators on the side of the road.

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Still Carrying Heavy Pet Food? That sucks

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Like if you have a vagina. Also like if you have a dong. (Penis)

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? I do not know because it depends on the woodchuck; however, if some statistical evidence is gathered on the average amount of wood a woodchuck could chuck you most likely would get a close answer, considering that the statistical research was not flawed.

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*insert lame joke stolen from the top 10 jokes and act like it's original because I changed one word*

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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