How do you earn a bunch of money all at once? Walk into Hot Topic and say "I have knives for sale!"

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Paper or plastic? Yes...

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Yo mama's chest is so flat that it's because she has stage five breast cancer and had to get both her breasts removed.

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roses are red violet are blue what are you gonna do when chuck norris find you

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A bloke runs into the bank, says to the girl "Stick 'em up!" She says "Righty-o, matey" and sellotapes his bollocks to the ceiling.

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yo mama is so old, so old that she was given senior citizen discount at the restaurant.

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What did the woman say when she ate crabs. This smells like my vagina (This women died slowly from crabs)

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Why did the lamborghini drive off the cliff? Because the person driving was a fridge

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he needed to go home.

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How many black people does it take to screw In a lightbulb.....I can't see them.

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asking someone to check ur broken wing mirror to fall into that persons arms by accident is not a good idea

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Why did the man read the terms of service? He had ignored them before, and was forced into a scam where a shady organization took all of his money and possessions. With no other way to provide for his family, the man began selling drugs, which led to several arrests. He has been n prison for 3 years now... His wife has left him for one of the man's close friends

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2 doctors are talking to each other? -Dead? -Dead.

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What is E.T. short For? So he can fit on ship

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What's long, hard and full of semen? A penis

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"knock, knock" "who is there?" Gestapo

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? Pizzas were meant to be put in an oven.

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Your momma is so fat, that she decided to sign up for weight-watchers, and is now on her way to a healthy life

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How many blonde chicks does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Two. One to set the house on fire, and the other to call 119.

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Yo momma stank so bad, she might have a serious vaginal infection. You should take her to the hospital.

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There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

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What's long,black and wrapped in something yellow ?? A twix

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? I've lost my tractor!

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I just wrote three jokes on antijoke.com ... nope, make that four.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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