I'm Batman.

why does andy speak when not spoken too because he wants a smack

Why did the girl scream at old people? She had turrets. www.youtube.com/LouisGames www.twitch.tv/KiLM_Ghostz

What is spiky and opens up wide? The Mouth…what were you thinking you perv?

Why didn't the chicken not get across the road? Cause it's head got shot off by some drunk asshole

Stare at the person nearest to you and say "sprinkles" with the straightest face possible.

Why did the cat cross the street? It didn't. I cut off its arms and legs so it couldn't walk.

How did Helen Keller burn the side of her face? She didn't use enough sunscreen.

How do catch Lady GaGa's attention? Have a Bad Romance

My heart is in my hands. Call an ambulance.

Doctor: Knock knock. Patient: Whose there? Doctor: Interrupting doctor. Patient: Interrupting doc... Doctor: Your son has AIDS and will die soon.

Why did I get thumbs up from everyone? Answer: Because they like my anti-joke.

What did the starving african child get for his birthday Ebola

Doctor: I'm sorry about your disease, young man. It looks like your time is up. Man: NO! How much time to I have? Doctor: Five. Man: Five years? Five months? Five weeks? Doctor: Four... Three...

What's the difference between a hipster and a steaming pile of shit? Many things.

why can't johnny compete in the track race? because he has no feet.

A white guy drives to Home Depot in order to get supplies for remodeling his kitchen. He notices a few Mexicans standing around outside. He decides not to racially profile them and continues on his own business.

Kyle grund parker coffey

Why did the frog commit suicide? Because his mother was a typewriter

Which is worse, 9/11 or the holocaust? Biting into an apple and finding a worm.

Roses are red Violets are blue Carnations are cheap and they will not get you a blow job.

What happend to the girl who went to school dreased ugly She took the other students advice and whent home and killed her self

Q: What is every blonde's ambition? A: To be like Vanna White and learn the alphabet.

A professor of literature asked me, "Young Sir, why are you burning those books?" I replied, "Because I need a fire to cremate the bones of your 3 sisters that I violently raped and murdered" He smirked in a witty and arrogant fashion, until raising his head and saying, "Bond, James Bond" He continued to massage his dick with his own pubic hairs before collapsing and dying

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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