A bunch of nuns were riding a three-seat bicycle. The seats were comfy and no one complained.

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What did the disrespectful cow say to his parents? Mooo. I hate you both

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A drunk walks out of a bar gets in his car and proceeds to drive home the driver passed out at the wheel swerved in the wrong lane and smashed the car of the Jefferson family a young family of 4, the Jefferson family's car exploded into flames while the drunk sat back laughed and rubbed the wound on his head

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If monkeys ate trees, than what would trees be made out of? No one knows because that will never happen.

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What did one apple say to the other apple? -Nothing, apples can't talk

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What's red and invisible? No tomatoes.

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Three people are stranded on an island. They didn't want to eat each other because they were friends. They died of starvation.

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Why does my friend pick up trash? Because he is a garbageman

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How many Jews can you fit into a Volkswagen Beatle? Two in the front, two in the back, and one hundred in the ash tray.

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You were born.

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Q: What is black and white, black and white, black and white? A: A Nun falling down the stairs.

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A duck walks into a bar "Can I have some brandy, please" says the duck The bartender then proceeds to make millions because he was the first to discover a talking duck

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A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

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What do you call a Knight who farts a lot? Sir Farts-a-lot

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im @ work, LOL.

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A man fell in a hole. He's dead now...

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What's better then one dead baby in a tub? Many things a dead baby is a tragedy.

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What do you calk a dirty mexican? a hard working gardener

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What did the woman find when she got home from the post office? Her son's corpse hanging from a clothes hanger. She was an abusive mom, and he killed himself.

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What do you call a Muslim on a plane? A passenger, you racist bastard.

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So a guy walks into a bar and says, "I can hold a spoon in between my butt-cheeks." Jillian Michaels asked him if that will help him lose weight.

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put my cock in your mouth. Submitted by Arsha K.

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There were three elephants in a bathtub. One said, "Pass me the soap." The other one said, "What do you think I am? A Radio???"

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A duck walks into a bar. Animal control is promptly called and the duck is released in a nearby park in a safe and risk free process.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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